Totally Unreadable

[InternetApex]

Can someone please explain what in the entire fuck I'm supposed to make of this?

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/brad-spirrison/the-end-of-a-golden-era-for-cubs-fans_b_6308330.html

Don't read it?

Too late. I need answers. I've tweeted at the author. I plan to destroy him before the end of the workday.

[Quality Start Machine]

Can someone please explain what in the entire fuck I'm supposed to make of this?

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/brad-spirrison/the-end-of-a-golden-era-for-cubs-fans_b_6308330.html

Don't read it?

Too late. I need answers. I've tweeted at the author. I plan to destroy him before the end of the workday.

As somebody who has spent some time involved with the various followers of the local ice hockey collective, I can asure you this type of thinking will only propogate. Dumbasses will howl at "bandwagon fans", as if there is some badge of honor that comes with having spent more time watching professional athletes earn their living that others. They will complain about the rising cost of ticket prices and beer prices, ignorant of the fact that you need to spend money to make money, and where is that revenue coming from? Todd's only making so much at Portillo's.

If he really wants a laid-back day at the ballpark without any emotional investment, he should go to Kane County. They're not a Cubs farm team any more, and the BBQ pork chop sandwich is still exceptional.

[CT III]

Can someone please explain what in the entire fuck I'm supposed to make of this?

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/brad-spirrison/the-end-of-a-golden-era-for-cubs-fans_b_6308330.html

Don't read it?

Too late. I need answers. I've tweeted at the author. I plan to destroy him before the end of the workday.

As somebody who has spent some time involved with the various followers of the local ice hockey collective, I can asure you this type of thinking will only propogate. Dumbasses will howl at "bandwagon fans", as if there is some badge of honor that comes with having spent more time watching professional athletes earn their living that others. They will complain about the rising cost of ticket prices and beer prices, ignorant of the fact that you need to spend money to make money, and where is that revenue coming from? Todd's only making so much at Portillo's.

If he really wants a laid-back day at the ballpark without any emotional investment, he should go to Kane County. They're not a Cubs farm team any more, and the BBQ pork chop sandwich is still exceptional.

I'm not even sure that's his point. It seems like he enjoyed having a couple of years with no expectations for the Cubs and following the guys in the minors.  I believe this may be satire. I'm not entirely sure though.

[Bort]

Can someone please explain what in the entire fuck I'm supposed to make of this?

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/brad-spirrison/the-end-of-a-golden-era-for-cubs-fans_b_6308330.html

Don't read it?

Too late. I need answers. I've tweeted at the author. I plan to destroy him before the end of the workday.

As somebody who has spent some time involved with the various followers of the local ice hockey collective, I can asure you this type of thinking will only propogate. Dumbasses will howl at "bandwagon fans", as if there is some badge of honor that comes with having spent more time watching professional athletes earn their living that others. They will complain about the rising cost of ticket prices and beer prices, ignorant of the fact that you need to spend money to make money, and where is that revenue coming from? Todd's only making so much at Portillo's.

If he really wants a laid-back day at the ballpark without any emotional investment, he should go to Kane County. They're not a Cubs farm team any more, and the BBQ pork chop sandwich is still exceptional.

I'm not even sure that's his point. It seems like he enjoyed having a couple of years with no expectations for the Cubs and following the guys in the minors.  I believe this may be satire. I'm not entirely sure though.

Well... He said he's a White Sox fan, so the subtext is "damn it, I'm not even going to be able to pretend my team is relevant in a few years."

Still that was dumb, even by meth addict standards.

[InternetApex]

Can someone please explain what in the entire fuck I'm supposed to make of this?

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/brad-spirrison/the-end-of-a-golden-era-for-cubs-fans_b_6308330.html

Don't read it?

Too late. I need answers. I've tweeted at the author. I plan to destroy him before the end of the workday.

As somebody who has spent some time involved with the various followers of the local ice hockey collective, I can asure you this type of thinking will only propogate. Dumbasses will howl at "bandwagon fans", as if there is some badge of honor that comes with having spent more time watching professional athletes earn their living that others. They will complain about the rising cost of ticket prices and beer prices, ignorant of the fact that you need to spend money to make money, and where is that revenue coming from? Todd's only making so much at Portillo's.

If he really wants a laid-back day at the ballpark without any emotional investment, he should go to Kane County. They're not a Cubs farm team any more, and the BBQ pork chop sandwich is still exceptional.

I'm not even sure that's his point. It seems like he enjoyed having a couple of years with no expectations for the Cubs and following the guys in the minors.  I believe this may be satire. I'm not entirely sure though.

Well... He said he's a White Sox fan, so the subtext is "damn it, I'm not even going to be able to pretend my team is relevant in a few years."

Still that was dumb, even by meth addict standards.

That's the part I couldn't figure out. Is he saying that he is or isn't a White Sox fan?

[Brownie]

Can someone please explain what in the entire fuck I'm supposed to make of this?

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/brad-spirrison/the-end-of-a-golden-era-for-cubs-fans_b_6308330.html

Don't read it?

Too late. I need answers. I've tweeted at the author. I plan to destroy him before the end of the workday.

As somebody who has spent some time involved with the various followers of the local ice hockey collective, I can asure you this type of thinking will only propogate. Dumbasses will howl at "bandwagon fans", as if there is some badge of honor that comes with having spent more time watching professional athletes earn their living that others. They will complain about the rising cost of ticket prices and beer prices, ignorant of the fact that you need to spend money to make money, and where is that revenue coming from? Todd's only making so much at Portillo's.

If he really wants a laid-back day at the ballpark without any emotional investment, he should go to Kane County. They're not a Cubs farm team any more, and the BBQ pork chop sandwich is still exceptional.

I'm not even sure that's his point. It seems like he enjoyed having a couple of years with no expectations for the Cubs and following the guys in the minors.  I believe this may be satire. I'm not entirely sure though.

Well... He said he's a White Sox fan, so the subtext is "damn it, I'm not even going to be able to pretend my team is relevant in a few years."

Still that was dumb, even by meth addict standards.

That's the part I couldn't figure out. Is he saying that he is or isn't a White Sox fan?

I think he's not a Sox fan. Also not a good writer.

Incidentally, Samardzija can now take his string of shutout innings and no-decisions to the South Side, where they appreciate a healthy combination of mullets and misery.

[Bort]

Yeah, thinking it over I think this article is the result of a bad writer trying to make what he thinks is satire, which in the modern Internet usage means "fake opinions delivered so seriously and humorlessly that you can't tell if the writer means it or not."

[CT III]

Yeah, thinking it over I think this article is the result of a bad writer trying to make what he thinks is satire, which in the modern Internet usage means "fake opinions delivered so seriously and humorlessly that you can't tell if the writer means it or not."

Also, we're pretty much reached the point on the internet where no fake opinion is insane enough that you can assume its satire.

[Saul Goodman]

Nah, I'm good.

[Eli]

Nah, I'm good.

It's a pretty run-of-the-mill column, actually.

[Saul Goodman]

Cool story bro.

[Eli]

Cool story bro.

Of course he has an affiliate link to Amazon for the blender.

[World's #1 Astros Fan]

Cool story bro.

Jesus, he's insufferable.

[PenFoe]

Cool story bro.

Jesus, he's insufferable.

So much anger for pretty much one of the two best places for actual information on the Cubs.

[Saul Goodman]

Cool story bro.

Jesus, he's insufferable.

So much anger for pretty much one of the two best places for actual information on the Cubs.

Some folks just can't handle a zero-to-sixty person.