Theo Epstein Sploosh Thread

[Tinker to Evers to Chance]

Yet in those 118 innings he gave up 105 hits and 45 walks. 

Those numbers are pretty good, Stew.

Are you doing a bit?

I think he's doing a bit and he has a few people going. I'm not buying it anymore but I'd like to see how far he can go with it.

I don't think this is a bit.  I think he's a meatball.

[Internet Apex]

Yet in those 118 innings he gave up 105 hits and 45 walks. 

Those numbers are pretty good, Stew.

Are you doing a bit?

I think he's doing a bit and he has a few people going. I'm not buying it anymore but I'd like to see how far he can go with it.

I don't think this is a bit.  I think he's a meatball.

Maybe he just wants his Desipio back. This used to be a place to come and kvetch about the Cubs. But we all have Jepstink's dong lodged in the lining of our cold, dead hearts and do nothing but agree with them - save for random fits of Chuckwrongness. So now Stew sees a move, and maybe it's a completely insignificant move like the Kotteras trade, or a low-impact signing like Wright and he just wants to kvetch dammit! I don't think it's meatball, but just a bit of fun. Not at our expense or anything, just some sort of exercise in butthurt. I do it all the time.

[Saul Goodman]

Yet in those 118 innings he gave up 105 hits and 45 walks. 

Those numbers are pretty good, Stew.

Are you doing a bit?

I think he's doing a bit and he has a few people going. I'm not buying it anymore but I'd like to see how far he can go with it.

I don't think this is a bit.  I think he's a meatball.

Maybe he just wants his Desipio back. This used to be a place to come and kvetch about the Cubs. But we all have Jepstink's dong lodged in the lining of our cold, dead hearts and do nothing but agree with them - save for random fits of Chuckwrongness. So now Stew sees a move, and maybe it's a completely insignificant move like the Kotteras trade, or a low-impact signing like Wright and he just wants to kvetch dammit! I don't think it's meatball, but just a bit of fun. Not at our expense or anything, just some sort of exercise in butthurt. I do it all the time.

Are exercises in butthurt sort of like kegel exercises?

[PenFoe]

Yet in those 118 innings he gave up 105 hits and 45 walks. 

Those numbers are pretty good, Stew.

Are you doing a bit?

I think he's doing a bit and he has a few people going. I'm not buying it anymore but I'd like to see how far he can go with it.

I don't think this is a bit.  I think he's a meatball.

Maybe he just wants his Desipio back. This used to be a place to come and kvetch about the Cubs. But we all have Jepstink's dong lodged in the lining of our cold, dead hearts and do nothing but agree with them - save for random fits of Chuckwrongness. So now Stew sees a move, and maybe it's a completely insignificant move like the Kotteras trade, or a low-impact signing like Wright and he just wants to kvetch dammit! I don't think it's meatball, but just a bit of fun. Not at our expense or anything, just some sort of exercise in butthurt. I do it all the time.

I admit it...I like this post.

[CBStew]

Yet in those 118 innings he gave up 105 hits and 45 walks. 

Those numbers are pretty good, Stew.

Are you doing a bit?

I think he's doing a bit and he has a few people going. I'm not buying it anymore but I'd like to see how far he can go with it.

I don't think this is a bit.  I think he's a meatball.

Maybe he just wants his Desipio back. This used to be a place to come and kvetch about the Cubs. But we all have Jepstink's dong lodged in the lining of our cold, dead hearts and do nothing but agree with them - save for random fits of Chuckwrongness. So now Stew sees a move, and maybe it's a completely insignificant move like the Kotteras trade, or a low-impact signing like Wright and he just wants to kvetch dammit! I don't think it's meatball, but just a bit of fun. Not at our expense or anything, just some sort of exercise in butthurt. I do it all the time.

Are exercises in butthurt sort of like kegel exercises?

Damn!  If I can't sulk here, where can I sulk?  I think that it is worth noting that a bunch of billionaires bought our team and we are being very considerate of their desire to spend as little of their money as possible.  There is a difference between spending wisely and foolishly.  We became accustomed to seeing stupid deals made by Hendry, so now we are forgiving of an ownership of a major market team pretending that it is running a non-profit corporation.  

[Internet Apex]

Yet in those 118 innings he gave up 105 hits and 45 walks. 

Those numbers are pretty good, Stew.

Are you doing a bit?

I think he's doing a bit and he has a few people going. I'm not buying it anymore but I'd like to see how far he can go with it.

I don't think this is a bit.  I think he's a meatball.

Maybe he just wants his Desipio back. This used to be a place to come and kvetch about the Cubs. But we all have Jepstink's dong lodged in the lining of our cold, dead hearts and do nothing but agree with them - save for random fits of Chuckwrongness. So now Stew sees a move, and maybe it's a completely insignificant move like the Kotteras trade, or a low-impact signing like Wright and he just wants to kvetch dammit! I don't think it's meatball, but just a bit of fun. Not at our expense or anything, just some sort of exercise in butthurt. I do it all the time.

Are exercises in butthurt sort of like kegel exercises?

I'm sure I don't know.

[Internet Apex]

Yet in those 118 innings he gave up 105 hits and 45 walks. 

Those numbers are pretty good, Stew.

Are you doing a bit?

I think he's doing a bit and he has a few people going. I'm not buying it anymore but I'd like to see how far he can go with it.

I don't think this is a bit.  I think he's a meatball.

Maybe he just wants his Desipio back. This used to be a place to come and kvetch about the Cubs. But we all have Jepstink's dong lodged in the lining of our cold, dead hearts and do nothing but agree with them - save for random fits of Chuckwrongness. So now Stew sees a move, and maybe it's a completely insignificant move like the Kotteras trade, or a low-impact signing like Wright and he just wants to kvetch dammit! I don't think it's meatball, but just a bit of fun. Not at our expense or anything, just some sort of exercise in butthurt. I do it all the time.

Are exercises in butthurt sort of like kegel exercises?

Damn!  If I can't sulk here, where can I sulk?  I think that it is worth noting that a bunch of billionaires bought our team and we are being very considerate of their desire to spend as little of their money as possible.  There is a difference between spending wisely and foolishly.  We became accustomed to seeing stupid deals made by Hendry, so now we are forgiving of an ownership of a major market team pretending that it is running a non-profit corporation.  

See?

[CBStew]

Yet in those 118 innings he gave up 105 hits and 45 walks. 

Those numbers are pretty good, Stew.

Are you doing a bit?

I think he's doing a bit and he has a few people going. I'm not buying it anymore but I'd like to see how far he can go with it.

I don't think this is a bit.  I think he's a meatball.

Maybe he just wants his Desipio back. This used to be a place to come and kvetch about the Cubs. But we all have Jepstink's dong lodged in the lining of our cold, dead hearts and do nothing but agree with them - save for random fits of Chuckwrongness. So now Stew sees a move, and maybe it's a completely insignificant move like the Kotteras trade, or a low-impact signing like Wright and he just wants to kvetch dammit! I don't think it's meatball, but just a bit of fun. Not at our expense or anything, just some sort of exercise in butthurt. I do it all the time.

Are exercises in butthurt sort of like kegel exercises?

Damn!  If I can't sulk here, where can I sulk?  I think that it is worth noting that a bunch of billionaires bought our team and we are being very considerate of their desire to spend as little of their money as possible.  There is a difference between spending wisely and foolishly.  We became accustomed to seeing stupid deals made by Hendry, so now we are forgiving of an ownership of a major market team pretending that it is running a non-profit corporation.  

See?

...and furthermore,  I watch what Oakland has been doing for years.  There is more to it than parsimony.  (I think that's the word.)  If Brad Pitt can produce a winner on a shoestring, why can't Epstein/Hoyer?  And if you tell me that it is a few years away, at my age that is like saying that they can't.

[Quality Start Machine]

Yet in those 118 innings he gave up 105 hits and 45 walks. 

Those numbers are pretty good, Stew.

Are you doing a bit?

I think he's doing a bit and he has a few people going. I'm not buying it anymore but I'd like to see how far he can go with it.

I don't think this is a bit.  I think he's a meatball.

Maybe he just wants his Desipio back. This used to be a place to come and kvetch about the Cubs. But we all have Jepstink's dong lodged in the lining of our cold, dead hearts and do nothing but agree with them - save for random fits of Chuckwrongness. So now Stew sees a move, and maybe it's a completely insignificant move like the Kotteras trade, or a low-impact signing like Wright and he just wants to kvetch dammit! I don't think it's meatball, but just a bit of fun. Not at our expense or anything, just some sort of exercise in butthurt. I do it all the time.

Are exercises in butthurt sort of like kegel exercises?

Damn!  If I can't sulk here, where can I sulk?  I think that it is worth noting that a bunch of billionaires bought our team and we are being very considerate of their desire to spend as little of their money as possible.  There is a difference between spending wisely and foolishly.  We became accustomed to seeing stupid deals made by Hendry, so now we are forgiving of an ownership of a major market team pretending that it is running a non-profit corporation.  

They hired Rocky Wirtz's accountants.

[Internet Apex]

Yet in those 118 innings he gave up 105 hits and 45 walks. 

Those numbers are pretty good, Stew.

Are you doing a bit?

I think he's doing a bit and he has a few people going. I'm not buying it anymore but I'd like to see how far he can go with it.

I don't think this is a bit.  I think he's a meatball.

Maybe he just wants his Desipio back. This used to be a place to come and kvetch about the Cubs. But we all have Jepstink's dong lodged in the lining of our cold, dead hearts and do nothing but agree with them - save for random fits of Chuckwrongness. So now Stew sees a move, and maybe it's a completely insignificant move like the Kotteras trade, or a low-impact signing like Wright and he just wants to kvetch dammit! I don't think it's meatball, but just a bit of fun. Not at our expense or anything, just some sort of exercise in butthurt. I do it all the time.

Are exercises in butthurt sort of like kegel exercises?

Damn!  If I can't sulk here, where can I sulk?  I think that it is worth noting that a bunch of billionaires bought our team and we are being very considerate of their desire to spend as little of their money as possible.  There is a difference between spending wisely and foolishly.  We became accustomed to seeing stupid deals made by Hendry, so now we are forgiving of an ownership of a major market team pretending that it is running a non-profit corporation.  

See?

...and furthermore,  I watch what Oakland has been doing for years.  There is more to it than parsimony.  (I think that's the word.)  If Brad Pitt can produce a winner on a shoestring, why can't Epstein/Hoyer?  And if you tell me that it is a few years away, at my age that is like saying that they can't.

Beane took over as GM of Oakland in 1997 and they didn't reach the playoffs until 2000-03.

[R-V]

Yet in those 118 innings he gave up 105 hits and 45 walks. 

Those numbers are pretty good, Stew.

Are you doing a bit?

I think he's doing a bit and he has a few people going. I'm not buying it anymore but I'd like to see how far he can go with it.

I don't think this is a bit.  I think he's a meatball.

Maybe he just wants his Desipio back. This used to be a place to come and kvetch about the Cubs. But we all have Jepstink's dong lodged in the lining of our cold, dead hearts and do nothing but agree with them - save for random fits of Chuckwrongness. So now Stew sees a move, and maybe it's a completely insignificant move like the Kotteras trade, or a low-impact signing like Wright and he just wants to kvetch dammit! I don't think it's meatball, but just a bit of fun. Not at our expense or anything, just some sort of exercise in butthurt. I do it all the time.

Endorsed. I for one am glad Stew and Eli are here to keep us all from choking on Jepstink's breathtaking, veiny, throbbing members. I commend Stew for heeding Al Swearengen's advice and giving some back to the franchise that has beaten him down for longer than any of us:

"Pain, or damage don't end the world, or despair, or fuckin' beatings. The world ends when you're dead. Until then, you got more punishment in store. Stand it like a man, and give some back."

[CBStew]

Yet in those 118 innings he gave up 105 hits and 45 walks. 

Those numbers are pretty good, Stew.

Are you doing a bit?

I think he's doing a bit and he has a few people going. I'm not buying it anymore but I'd like to see how far he can go with it.

I don't think this is a bit.  I think he's a meatball.

Maybe he just wants his Desipio back. This used to be a place to come and kvetch about the Cubs. But we all have Jepstink's dong lodged in the lining of our cold, dead hearts and do nothing but agree with them - save for random fits of Chuckwrongness. So now Stew sees a move, and maybe it's a completely insignificant move like the Kotteras trade, or a low-impact signing like Wright and he just wants to kvetch dammit! I don't think it's meatball, but just a bit of fun. Not at our expense or anything, just some sort of exercise in butthurt. I do it all the time.

Endorsed. I for one am glad Stew and Eli are here to keep us all from choking on Jepstink's breathtaking, veiny, throbbing members. I commend Stew for heeding Al Swearengen's advice and giving some back to the franchise that has beaten him down for longer than any of us:

"Pain, or damage don't end the world, or despair, or fuckin' beatings. The world ends when you're dead. Until then, you got more punishment in store. Stand it like a man, and give some back."

That was a damn good show.  Modern day Shakespeare.

[Slaky]

Fork, Hawk and myself met for lunch today and surmised that when the Cubs get good again this board will pick up.

Sure we scared off all the hardcore right wingers with sad feely parts but some of you stayed.

Sure we try talking about other stuff.

Sure Dolan hasn't admitted a new member in 8 years.

But damn it when the Cubs are good again we'll be here during work chattin about splooge and flappity flaps and maybe ol' Andy will even bring back some kind of Game Day Chat Thread thing.

I can dream.

[SKO]

Fork, Hawk and myself met for lunch today and surmised that when the Cubs get good again this board will pick up.

Sure we scared off all the hardcore right wingers with sad feely parts but some of you stayed.

Sure we try talking about other stuff.

Sure Dolan hasn't admitted a new member in 8 years.

But damn it when the Cubs are good again we'll be here during work chattin about splooge and flappity flaps and maybe ol' Andy will even bring back some kind of Game Day Chat Thread thing.

I can dream.

It's really weird to think that I haven't been actively involved in my Cubs fandom now for four years, and it doesn't really even bother me. A gap like that would have been unthinkable when I was a kid or a teenager and I prided myself on supporting the Cubs no matter how shitty they got, but now I see no problem with remaining technically interested as a fan and bookmarking 8 or 9 players on Minor League Baseball.com and following the prospect rankings while watching barely a dozen games until they start bringing up the kids.

[CBStew]

It just isn't fair.  St. Louis wins.  Boston wins. San Francisco wins.  The Whyt Sucks win.  Even Arizona won.  Everybody else wins.  If there was a major league team in Stockton it would win. 
(Don't tell me about goats.  That happened in 1945, 37 years after the Cubs stopped winning World Series.)