Ozzie Guillen

[Brownie]

Is there any worse subject any MLB manager in any other city could broach than Guillen saying how much he respects Fidel Castro in Miami?

If you eliminate racial/ethnic/sexist/homophobic slurs, which at least a couple times a year we get a mini-firestorm of someone's fourth outfielder or middle reliever saying, is there any controversial subject elsewhere so radioactive as Castro in Miami?

What I'm trying to say is that if Guillen were the Tampa Bay manager, or the Nationals' manager or the Padres' manager, no one would raise an eyebrow. Why wouldn't anyone brief Guillen on this as soon as he became Marlins' manager? ("Ozzie, you can talk about any controversial subject you'd like, except don't call anyone a "fag" again, and do not, repeat do not, say anything that could even remotely be considered complimentary to Fidel Castro in this town.")

[J. Walter Weatherman]

Saying "je ne parle pas français" while coaching the Montreal Canadiens?

(Or maybe even just "je n'aime pas le Pepsi".)

[PenPho]

Is there any worse subject any MLB manager in any other city could broach than Guillen saying how much he respects Fidel Castro in Miami?

If you eliminate racial/ethnic/sexist/homophobic slurs, which at least a couple times a year we get a mini-firestorm of someone's fourth outfielder or middle reliever saying, is there any controversial subject elsewhere so radioactive as Castro in Miami?

What I'm trying to say is that if Guillen were the Tampa Bay manager, or the Nationals' manager or the Padres' manager, no one would raise an eyebrow. Why wouldn't anyone brief Guillen on this as soon as he became Marlins' manager? ("Ozzie, you can talk about any controversial subject you'd like, except don't call anyone a "fag" again, and do not, repeat do not, say anything that could even remotely be considered complimentary to Fidel Castro in this town.")

Hmmm...anything worse?

Girardi: "I don't understand all these complaints about ticket prices, these damn Jews never have a problem spending $20 on a corned beef sandwich."
Bochy: "I wonder if the reason that Timmy is so popular is because all these homos like his tight pants."
Wakamatsu: "I don't think anyone is really upset about trading Pineda for Montero. All these Japs think the Spics look the same anyway."

I could go on, but I think that Ozzie probably would still end up winning this one.

[Chuck to Chuck]

Why wouldn't anyone brief Guillen on this as soon as he became Marlins' manager?

He has worked there before.

[World's #1 Astros Fan]

Fuck Miami.

All of it.

[Saul Goodman]

Is there any worse subject any MLB manager in any other city could broach than Guillen saying how much he respects Fidel Castro in Miami?

If you eliminate racial/ethnic/sexist/homophobic slurs, which at least a couple times a year we get a mini-firestorm of someone's fourth outfielder or middle reliever saying, is there any controversial subject elsewhere so radioactive as Castro in Miami?

What I'm trying to say is that if Guillen were the Tampa Bay manager, or the Nationals' manager or the Padres' manager, no one would raise an eyebrow. Why wouldn't anyone brief Guillen on this as soon as he became Marlins' manager? ("Ozzie, you can talk about any controversial subject you'd like, except don't call anyone a "fag" again, and do not, repeat do not, say anything that could even remotely be considered complimentary to Fidel Castro in this town.")

Hmmm...anything worse?

Girardi: "I don't understand all these complaints about ticket prices, these damn Jews never have a problem spending $20 on a corned beef sandwich."
Bochy: "I wonder if the reason that Timmy is so popular is because all these homos like his tight pants."
Wakamatsu: "I don't think anyone is really upset about trading Pineda for Montero. All these Japs think the Spics look the same anyway."

I could go on, but I think that Ozzie probably would still end up winning this one.

You do know Wakamatsu (whose father is Japanese) isn't the manager there anymore, correct? Fired in 2010?

[PenPho]

Is there any worse subject any MLB manager in any other city could broach than Guillen saying how much he respects Fidel Castro in Miami?

If you eliminate racial/ethnic/sexist/homophobic slurs, which at least a couple times a year we get a mini-firestorm of someone's fourth outfielder or middle reliever saying, is there any controversial subject elsewhere so radioactive as Castro in Miami?

What I'm trying to say is that if Guillen were the Tampa Bay manager, or the Nationals' manager or the Padres' manager, no one would raise an eyebrow. Why wouldn't anyone brief Guillen on this as soon as he became Marlins' manager? ("Ozzie, you can talk about any controversial subject you'd like, except don't call anyone a "fag" again, and do not, repeat do not, say anything that could even remotely be considered complimentary to Fidel Castro in this town.")

Hmmm...anything worse?

Girardi: "I don't understand all these complaints about ticket prices, these damn Jews never have a problem spending $20 on a corned beef sandwich."
Bochy: "I wonder if the reason that Timmy is so popular is because all these homos like his tight pants."
Wakamatsu: "I don't think anyone is really upset about trading Pineda for Montero. All these Japs think the Spics look the same anyway."

I could go on, but I think that Ozzie probably would still end up winning this one.

You do know Wakamatsu (whose father is Japanese) isn't the manager there anymore, correct? Fired in 2010?

If I knew that, I probably would have used the correct person.

[SKO]

Fuck Miami.

All of it.

Dan Marino is the son of a whore.

[Brownie]

Is there any worse subject any MLB manager in any other city could broach than Guillen saying how much he respects Fidel Castro in Miami?

If you eliminate racial/ethnic/sexist/homophobic slurs, which at least a couple times a year we get a mini-firestorm of someone's fourth outfielder or middle reliever saying, is there any controversial subject elsewhere so radioactive as Castro in Miami?

What I'm trying to say is that if Guillen were the Tampa Bay manager, or the Nationals' manager or the Padres' manager, no one would raise an eyebrow. Why wouldn't anyone brief Guillen on this as soon as he became Marlins' manager? ("Ozzie, you can talk about any controversial subject you'd like, except don't call anyone a "fag" again, and do not, repeat do not, say anything that could even remotely be considered complimentary to Fidel Castro in this town.")

Hmmm...anything worse?

Girardi: "I don't understand all these complaints about ticket prices, these damn Jews never have a problem spending $20 on a corned beef sandwich."
Bochy: "I wonder if the reason that Timmy is so popular is because all these homos like his tight pants."
Wakamatsu: "I don't think anyone is really upset about trading Pineda for Montero. All these Japs think the Spics look the same anyway."

I could go on, but I think that Ozzie probably would still end up winning this one.

So, eliminate all the ethnic slurs.

Leyland: "I'll never buy and American car again after those idiots in Washington bailed those assholes out."
Bobby Valentine: "Our season has the same fate as Mary Jo Kopechne and Detroit was our Chappaquiddick."
Terry Francona (2011): "I wouldn't be so dependent on pain  pills if not for RomneyCare/ObamaCare."
Ron Washington: "How bad can cocaine be, at least compared to steak? At least I'm not injesting dead steer."

[Internet Apex]

Quade: "Why the fuck do these meatballs still have DeRosa's dong hanging out of their mouths?"

[PenPho]

Is there any worse subject any MLB manager in any other city could broach than Guillen saying how much he respects Fidel Castro in Miami?

If you eliminate racial/ethnic/sexist/homophobic slurs, which at least a couple times a year we get a mini-firestorm of someone's fourth outfielder or middle reliever saying, is there any controversial subject elsewhere so radioactive as Castro in Miami?

What I'm trying to say is that if Guillen were the Tampa Bay manager, or the Nationals' manager or the Padres' manager, no one would raise an eyebrow. Why wouldn't anyone brief Guillen on this as soon as he became Marlins' manager? ("Ozzie, you can talk about any controversial subject you'd like, except don't call anyone a "fag" again, and do not, repeat do not, say anything that could even remotely be considered complimentary to Fidel Castro in this town.")

Hmmm...anything worse?

Girardi: "I don't understand all these complaints about ticket prices, these damn Jews never have a problem spending $20 on a corned beef sandwich."
Bochy: "I wonder if the reason that Timmy is so popular is because all these homos like his tight pants."
Wakamatsu: "I don't think anyone is really upset about trading Pineda for Montero. All these Japs think the Spics look the same anyway."

I could go on, but I think that Ozzie probably would still end up winning this one.

So, eliminate all the ethnic slurs.

Leyland: "I'll never buy and American car again after those idiots in Washington bailed those assholes out."
Bobby Valentine: "Our season has the same fate as Mary Jo Kopechne and Detroit was our Chappaquiddick."
Terry Francona (2011): "I wouldn't be so dependent on pain  pills if not for RomneyCare/ObamaCare."
Ron Washington: "How bad can cocaine be, at least compared to steak? At least I'm not injesting dead steer."

Not surprisingly, you're better at this.

Carry on.

[SKO]

Is there any worse subject any MLB manager in any other city could broach than Guillen saying how much he respects Fidel Castro in Miami?

If you eliminate racial/ethnic/sexist/homophobic slurs, which at least a couple times a year we get a mini-firestorm of someone's fourth outfielder or middle reliever saying, is there any controversial subject elsewhere so radioactive as Castro in Miami?

What I'm trying to say is that if Guillen were the Tampa Bay manager, or the Nationals' manager or the Padres' manager, no one would raise an eyebrow. Why wouldn't anyone brief Guillen on this as soon as he became Marlins' manager? ("Ozzie, you can talk about any controversial subject you'd like, except don't call anyone a "fag" again, and do not, repeat do not, say anything that could even remotely be considered complimentary to Fidel Castro in this town.")

Hmmm...anything worse?

Girardi: "I don't understand all these complaints about ticket prices, these damn Jews never have a problem spending $20 on a corned beef sandwich."
Bochy: "I wonder if the reason that Timmy is so popular is because all these homos like his tight pants."
Wakamatsu: "I don't think anyone is really upset about trading Pineda for Montero. All these Japs think the Spics look the same anyway."

I could go on, but I think that Ozzie probably would still end up winning this one.

So, eliminate all the ethnic slurs.

Leyland: "I'll never buy and American car again after those idiots in Washington bailed those assholes out."
Bobby Valentine: "Our season has the same fate as Mary Jo Kopechne and Detroit was our Chappaquiddick."
Terry Francona (2011): "I wouldn't be so dependent on pain  pills if not for RomneyCare/ObamaCare."
Ron Washington: "How bad can cocaine be, at least compared to steak? At least I'm not injesting dead steer."

Charlie Manuel: I think we need to invest in renewable resources, stop using batteries.

[Slaky]

Faceless Houston manager: I'm voting for Obama

[PenPho]

Faceless Houston manager: I'm voting for Obama

I can't think of a better city for this, but whoever manages Houston (I'm sure Archer will tell us) probably would at least have the support of the immediate locals. 

[Brownie]

Dale Sveum: "As the only Phoenix Coyotes fan in North America, I have my broom ready, female doges."