Cubs' Prospects FUTUREBONER thread

[InternetApex]

I have always hated that fat fuck Jared from Subway. In Indy it's common to see him hanging around downtown, especially at sporting events with his dorky friends. They get approached by people who are impressed by him. He's supposed to be promoting some healthy diet of bread and meat but every time I saw him he was fat and drunk and ugly as homemade sin.

I once saw him at a Colts game sitting in a section below mine. I was in the front row of the balcony at the old Hoosier/RCA Dump and he was in the front ass row with his crew of (child oggling) derelicts. People were yelling to him and he kept turning around to wave. At one perfectly calm moment, I yelled, "HEY JARED!" He turned around and looked right at me and I yelled, "GET A JOB!" Hilarity ensued.

I can't explain it but there was always something phony about him. His on-screen persona didn't mesh with his beer guzzling fat ass frat boy ways and actions. I always figured he would have been some sort of white collar thief if it weren't for his fame. But I didn't suspect this. He sickens me about as much as any human I've ever seen in real life.

Fuck him, fuck Subway, fuck the Colts.

Sterling likes this.  I've always hated him too, but now I actually have sensible reasons.

Hey man, I think hating him just for being a creepy fat dude who became famous by eating sawdust bread sandwiches three times a day and going on TV to talk about it was perfectly sensible. I don't need Jan from Toyota to get caught selling meth for me to have valid reasons for wanting her launched into space.

Woah, woah, woah, woah, woah, woah... woah...

Toyota Jan is a piece of shit

I'm not here to defend her or Toyota. You all can feel however you want. But she is hot.

[Yeti]

I have always hated that fat fuck Jared from Subway. In Indy it's common to see him hanging around downtown, especially at sporting events with his dorky friends. They get approached by people who are impressed by him. He's supposed to be promoting some healthy diet of bread and meat but every time I saw him he was fat and drunk and ugly as homemade sin.

I once saw him at a Colts game sitting in a section below mine. I was in the front row of the balcony at the old Hoosier/RCA Dump and he was in the front ass row with his crew of (child oggling) derelicts. People were yelling to him and he kept turning around to wave. At one perfectly calm moment, I yelled, "HEY JARED!" He turned around and looked right at me and I yelled, "GET A JOB!" Hilarity ensued.

I can't explain it but there was always something phony about him. His on-screen persona didn't mesh with his beer guzzling fat ass frat boy ways and actions. I always figured he would have been some sort of white collar thief if it weren't for his fame. But I didn't suspect this. He sickens me about as much as any human I've ever seen in real life.

Fuck him, fuck Subway, fuck the Colts.

Sterling likes this.  I've always hated him too, but now I actually have sensible reasons.

Hey man, I think hating him just for being a creepy fat dude who became famous by eating sawdust bread sandwiches three times a day and going on TV to talk about it was perfectly sensible. I don't need Jan from Toyota to get caught selling meth for me to have valid reasons for wanting her launched into space.

Woah, woah, woah, woah, woah, woah... woah...

Toyota Jan is a piece of shit

I'm not here to defend her or Toyota. You all can feel however you want. But she is hot.

Now that I've educated myself, yea, she's nothing exceptional. Would put it in, but I'm not enamored. Plus, she's married to Chet

[Quality Start Machine]

I have always hated that fat fuck Jared from Subway. In Indy it's common to see him hanging around downtown, especially at sporting events with his dorky friends. They get approached by people who are impressed by him. He's supposed to be promoting some healthy diet of bread and meat but every time I saw him he was fat and drunk and ugly as homemade sin.

I once saw him at a Colts game sitting in a section below mine. I was in the front row of the balcony at the old Hoosier/RCA Dump and he was in the front ass row with his crew of (child oggling) derelicts. People were yelling to him and he kept turning around to wave. At one perfectly calm moment, I yelled, "HEY JARED!" He turned around and looked right at me and I yelled, "GET A JOB!" Hilarity ensued.

I can't explain it but there was always something phony about him. His on-screen persona didn't mesh with his beer guzzling fat ass frat boy ways and actions. I always figured he would have been some sort of white collar thief if it weren't for his fame. But I didn't suspect this. He sickens me about as much as any human I've ever seen in real life.

Fuck him, fuck Subway, fuck the Colts.

Sterling likes this.  I've always hated him too, but now I actually have sensible reasons.

Hey man, I think hating him just for being a creepy fat dude who became famous by eating sawdust bread sandwiches three times a day and going on TV to talk about it was perfectly sensible. I don't need Jan from Toyota to get caught selling meth for me to have valid reasons for wanting her launched into space.

Woah, woah, woah, woah, woah, woah... woah...

Toyota Jan is a piece of shit

I'm not here to defend her or Toyota. You all can feel however you want. But she is hot.

Now that I've educated myself, yea, she's nothing exceptional. Would put it in, but I'm not enamored. Plus, she's married to Chet

You'd put it in knowing you're following Chet?

eewww.

[Slaky]

I have always hated that fat fuck Jared from Subway. In Indy it's common to see him hanging around downtown, especially at sporting events with his dorky friends. They get approached by people who are impressed by him. He's supposed to be promoting some healthy diet of bread and meat but every time I saw him he was fat and drunk and ugly as homemade sin.

I once saw him at a Colts game sitting in a section below mine. I was in the front row of the balcony at the old Hoosier/RCA Dump and he was in the front ass row with his crew of (child oggling) derelicts. People were yelling to him and he kept turning around to wave. At one perfectly calm moment, I yelled, "HEY JARED!" He turned around and looked right at me and I yelled, "GET A JOB!" Hilarity ensued.

I can't explain it but there was always something phony about him. His on-screen persona didn't mesh with his beer guzzling fat ass frat boy ways and actions. I always figured he would have been some sort of white collar thief if it weren't for his fame. But I didn't suspect this. He sickens me about as much as any human I've ever seen in real life.

Fuck him, fuck Subway, fuck the Colts.

Sterling likes this.  I've always hated him too, but now I actually have sensible reasons.

Hey man, I think hating him just for being a creepy fat dude who became famous by eating sawdust bread sandwiches three times a day and going on TV to talk about it was perfectly sensible. I don't need Jan from Toyota to get caught selling meth for me to have valid reasons for wanting her launched into space.

Woah, woah, woah, woah, woah, woah... woah...

Toyota Jan is a piece of shit

I'm not here to defend her or Toyota. You all can feel however you want. But she is hot.

It's not her looks that are repugnant.

AT&T girl is a whole different story. Yes.

[Quality Start Machine]

I have always hated that fat fuck Jared from Subway. In Indy it's common to see him hanging around downtown, especially at sporting events with his dorky friends. They get approached by people who are impressed by him. He's supposed to be promoting some healthy diet of bread and meat but every time I saw him he was fat and drunk and ugly as homemade sin.

I once saw him at a Colts game sitting in a section below mine. I was in the front row of the balcony at the old Hoosier/RCA Dump and he was in the front ass row with his crew of (child oggling) derelicts. People were yelling to him and he kept turning around to wave. At one perfectly calm moment, I yelled, "HEY JARED!" He turned around and looked right at me and I yelled, "GET A JOB!" Hilarity ensued.

I can't explain it but there was always something phony about him. His on-screen persona didn't mesh with his beer guzzling fat ass frat boy ways and actions. I always figured he would have been some sort of white collar thief if it weren't for his fame. But I didn't suspect this. He sickens me about as much as any human I've ever seen in real life.

Fuck him, fuck Subway, fuck the Colts.

Sterling likes this.  I've always hated him too, but now I actually have sensible reasons.

Hey man, I think hating him just for being a creepy fat dude who became famous by eating sawdust bread sandwiches three times a day and going on TV to talk about it was perfectly sensible. I don't need Jan from Toyota to get caught selling meth for me to have valid reasons for wanting her launched into space.

Woah, woah, woah, woah, woah, woah... woah...

Toyota Jan is a piece of shit

I'm not here to defend her or Toyota. You all can feel however you want. But she is hot.

It's not her looks that are repugnant.

AT&T girl is a whole different story. Yes.

If we're going to throw them all into a Thunderdome, don't forget the girl from Wendy's.

[InternetApex]

I have always hated that fat fuck Jared from Subway. In Indy it's common to see him hanging around downtown, especially at sporting events with his dorky friends. They get approached by people who are impressed by him. He's supposed to be promoting some healthy diet of bread and meat but every time I saw him he was fat and drunk and ugly as homemade sin.

I once saw him at a Colts game sitting in a section below mine. I was in the front row of the balcony at the old Hoosier/RCA Dump and he was in the front ass row with his crew of (child oggling) derelicts. People were yelling to him and he kept turning around to wave. At one perfectly calm moment, I yelled, "HEY JARED!" He turned around and looked right at me and I yelled, "GET A JOB!" Hilarity ensued.

I can't explain it but there was always something phony about him. His on-screen persona didn't mesh with his beer guzzling fat ass frat boy ways and actions. I always figured he would have been some sort of white collar thief if it weren't for his fame. But I didn't suspect this. He sickens me about as much as any human I've ever seen in real life.

Fuck him, fuck Subway, fuck the Colts.

Sterling likes this.  I've always hated him too, but now I actually have sensible reasons.

Hey man, I think hating him just for being a creepy fat dude who became famous by eating sawdust bread sandwiches three times a day and going on TV to talk about it was perfectly sensible. I don't need Jan from Toyota to get caught selling meth for me to have valid reasons for wanting her launched into space.

Woah, woah, woah, woah, woah, woah... woah...

Toyota Jan is a piece of shit

I'm not here to defend her or Toyota. You all can feel however you want. But she is hot.

It's not her looks that are repugnant.

AT&T girl is a whole different story. Yes.

If we're going to throw them all into a Thunderdome, don't forget the girl from Wendy's.

Now her I can't stand. Wouldn't touch her with Yeti's dick.

[Slaky]

I have always hated that fat fuck Jared from Subway. In Indy it's common to see him hanging around downtown, especially at sporting events with his dorky friends. They get approached by people who are impressed by him. He's supposed to be promoting some healthy diet of bread and meat but every time I saw him he was fat and drunk and ugly as homemade sin.

I once saw him at a Colts game sitting in a section below mine. I was in the front row of the balcony at the old Hoosier/RCA Dump and he was in the front ass row with his crew of (child oggling) derelicts. People were yelling to him and he kept turning around to wave. At one perfectly calm moment, I yelled, "HEY JARED!" He turned around and looked right at me and I yelled, "GET A JOB!" Hilarity ensued.

I can't explain it but there was always something phony about him. His on-screen persona didn't mesh with his beer guzzling fat ass frat boy ways and actions. I always figured he would have been some sort of white collar thief if it weren't for his fame. But I didn't suspect this. He sickens me about as much as any human I've ever seen in real life.

Fuck him, fuck Subway, fuck the Colts.

Sterling likes this.  I've always hated him too, but now I actually have sensible reasons.

Hey man, I think hating him just for being a creepy fat dude who became famous by eating sawdust bread sandwiches three times a day and going on TV to talk about it was perfectly sensible. I don't need Jan from Toyota to get caught selling meth for me to have valid reasons for wanting her launched into space.

Woah, woah, woah, woah, woah, woah... woah...

Toyota Jan is a piece of shit

I'm not here to defend her or Toyota. You all can feel however you want. But she is hot.

It's not her looks that are repugnant.

AT&T girl is a whole different story. Yes.

If we're going to throw them all into a Thunderdome, don't forget the girl from Wendy's.

Now her I can't stand. Wouldn't touch her with Yeti's dick.

She sucks too. She's awful.

To be clear, the AT&T girl is very nice.

[Quality Start Machine]

I have always hated that fat fuck Jared from Subway. In Indy it's common to see him hanging around downtown, especially at sporting events with his dorky friends. They get approached by people who are impressed by him. He's supposed to be promoting some healthy diet of bread and meat but every time I saw him he was fat and drunk and ugly as homemade sin.

I once saw him at a Colts game sitting in a section below mine. I was in the front row of the balcony at the old Hoosier/RCA Dump and he was in the front ass row with his crew of (child oggling) derelicts. People were yelling to him and he kept turning around to wave. At one perfectly calm moment, I yelled, "HEY JARED!" He turned around and looked right at me and I yelled, "GET A JOB!" Hilarity ensued.

I can't explain it but there was always something phony about him. His on-screen persona didn't mesh with his beer guzzling fat ass frat boy ways and actions. I always figured he would have been some sort of white collar thief if it weren't for his fame. But I didn't suspect this. He sickens me about as much as any human I've ever seen in real life.

Fuck him, fuck Subway, fuck the Colts.

Sterling likes this.  I've always hated him too, but now I actually have sensible reasons.

Hey man, I think hating him just for being a creepy fat dude who became famous by eating sawdust bread sandwiches three times a day and going on TV to talk about it was perfectly sensible. I don't need Jan from Toyota to get caught selling meth for me to have valid reasons for wanting her launched into space.

Woah, woah, woah, woah, woah, woah... woah...

Toyota Jan is a piece of shit

I'm not here to defend her or Toyota. You all can feel however you want. But she is hot.

It's not her looks that are repugnant.

AT&T girl is a whole different story. Yes.

If we're going to throw them all into a Thunderdome, don't forget the girl from Wendy's.

Now her I can't stand. Wouldn't touch her with Yeti's dick.

She sucks too. She's awful.

To be clear, the AT&T girl is very nice.

Whatever happened to the T-Mobile girl? Her, I liked.

[Chuck to Chuck]

I have always hated that fat fuck Jared from Subway. In Indy it's common to see him hanging around downtown, especially at sporting events with his dorky friends. They get approached by people who are impressed by him. He's supposed to be promoting some healthy diet of bread and meat but every time I saw him he was fat and drunk and ugly as homemade sin.

I once saw him at a Colts game sitting in a section below mine. I was in the front row of the balcony at the old Hoosier/RCA Dump and he was in the front ass row with his crew of (child oggling) derelicts. People were yelling to him and he kept turning around to wave. At one perfectly calm moment, I yelled, "HEY JARED!" He turned around and looked right at me and I yelled, "GET A JOB!" Hilarity ensued.

I can't explain it but there was always something phony about him. His on-screen persona didn't mesh with his beer guzzling fat ass frat boy ways and actions. I always figured he would have been some sort of white collar thief if it weren't for his fame. But I didn't suspect this. He sickens me about as much as any human I've ever seen in real life.

Fuck him, fuck Subway, fuck the Colts.

Sterling likes this.  I've always hated him too, but now I actually have sensible reasons.

Hey man, I think hating him just for being a creepy fat dude who became famous by eating sawdust bread sandwiches three times a day and going on TV to talk about it was perfectly sensible. I don't need Jan from Toyota to get caught selling meth for me to have valid reasons for wanting her launched into space.

Woah, woah, woah, woah, woah, woah... woah...

Toyota Jan is a piece of shit

I'm not here to defend her or Toyota. You all can feel however you want. But she is hot.

It's not her looks that are repugnant.

AT&T girl is a whole different story. Yes.

If we're going to throw them all into a Thunderdome, don't forget the girl from Wendy's.

Now her I can't stand. Wouldn't touch her with Yeti's dick.

She sucks too. She's awful.

To be clear, the AT&T girl is very nice.

Whatever happened to the T-Mobile girl? Her, I liked.

whoisthathotadgirl.tumblr.com/

https://twitter.com/FoulkesCarly

[ChuckD]

I have always hated that fat fuck Jared from Subway. In Indy it's common to see him hanging around downtown, especially at sporting events with his dorky friends. They get approached by people who are impressed by him. He's supposed to be promoting some healthy diet of bread and meat but every time I saw him he was fat and drunk and ugly as homemade sin.

I once saw him at a Colts game sitting in a section below mine. I was in the front row of the balcony at the old Hoosier/RCA Dump and he was in the front ass row with his crew of (child oggling) derelicts. People were yelling to him and he kept turning around to wave. At one perfectly calm moment, I yelled, "HEY JARED!" He turned around and looked right at me and I yelled, "GET A JOB!" Hilarity ensued.

I can't explain it but there was always something phony about him. His on-screen persona didn't mesh with his beer guzzling fat ass frat boy ways and actions. I always figured he would have been some sort of white collar thief if it weren't for his fame. But I didn't suspect this. He sickens me about as much as any human I've ever seen in real life.

Fuck him, fuck Subway, fuck the Colts.

Sterling likes this.  I've always hated him too, but now I actually have sensible reasons.

Hey man, I think hating him just for being a creepy fat dude who became famous by eating sawdust bread sandwiches three times a day and going on TV to talk about it was perfectly sensible. I don't need Jan from Toyota to get caught selling meth for me to have valid reasons for wanting her launched into space.

Woah, woah, woah, woah, woah, woah... woah...

Toyota Jan is a piece of shit

I'm not here to defend her or Toyota. You all can feel however you want. But she is hot.

It's not her looks that are repugnant.

AT&T girl is a whole different story. Yes.

If we're going to throw them all into a Thunderdome, don't forget the girl from Wendy's.

Now her I can't stand. Wouldn't touch her with Yeti's dick.

She sucks too. She's awful.

To be clear, the AT&T girl is very nice.

She played Gilfoyle's satanic girlfriend on Silicon Valley.

[Bort]

I have always hated that fat fuck Jared from Subway. In Indy it's common to see him hanging around downtown, especially at sporting events with his dorky friends. They get approached by people who are impressed by him. He's supposed to be promoting some healthy diet of bread and meat but every time I saw him he was fat and drunk and ugly as homemade sin.

I once saw him at a Colts game sitting in a section below mine. I was in the front row of the balcony at the old Hoosier/RCA Dump and he was in the front ass row with his crew of (child oggling) derelicts. People were yelling to him and he kept turning around to wave. At one perfectly calm moment, I yelled, "HEY JARED!" He turned around and looked right at me and I yelled, "GET A JOB!" Hilarity ensued.

I can't explain it but there was always something phony about him. His on-screen persona didn't mesh with his beer guzzling fat ass frat boy ways and actions. I always figured he would have been some sort of white collar thief if it weren't for his fame. But I didn't suspect this. He sickens me about as much as any human I've ever seen in real life.

Fuck him, fuck Subway, fuck the Colts.

Sterling likes this.  I've always hated him too, but now I actually have sensible reasons.

Hey man, I think hating him just for being a creepy fat dude who became famous by eating sawdust bread sandwiches three times a day and going on TV to talk about it was perfectly sensible. I don't need Jan from Toyota to get caught selling meth for me to have valid reasons for wanting her launched into space.

Woah, woah, woah, woah, woah, woah... woah...

Toyota Jan is a piece of shit

I'm not here to defend her or Toyota. You all can feel however you want. But she is hot.

It's not her looks that are repugnant.

AT&T girl is a whole different story. Yes.

If we're going to throw them all into a Thunderdome, don't forget the girl from Wendy's.

Now her I can't stand. Wouldn't touch her with Yeti's dick.

She sucks too. She's awful.

To be clear, the AT&T girl is very nice.

She played Gilfoyle's satanic girlfriend on Silicon Valley.

That is a sequence of words that makes sense to some people, I'm sure.

[Slaky]

I have always hated that fat fuck Jared from Subway. In Indy it's common to see him hanging around downtown, especially at sporting events with his dorky friends. They get approached by people who are impressed by him. He's supposed to be promoting some healthy diet of bread and meat but every time I saw him he was fat and drunk and ugly as homemade sin.

I once saw him at a Colts game sitting in a section below mine. I was in the front row of the balcony at the old Hoosier/RCA Dump and he was in the front ass row with his crew of (child oggling) derelicts. People were yelling to him and he kept turning around to wave. At one perfectly calm moment, I yelled, "HEY JARED!" He turned around and looked right at me and I yelled, "GET A JOB!" Hilarity ensued.

I can't explain it but there was always something phony about him. His on-screen persona didn't mesh with his beer guzzling fat ass frat boy ways and actions. I always figured he would have been some sort of white collar thief if it weren't for his fame. But I didn't suspect this. He sickens me about as much as any human I've ever seen in real life.

Fuck him, fuck Subway, fuck the Colts.

Sterling likes this.  I've always hated him too, but now I actually have sensible reasons.

Hey man, I think hating him just for being a creepy fat dude who became famous by eating sawdust bread sandwiches three times a day and going on TV to talk about it was perfectly sensible. I don't need Jan from Toyota to get caught selling meth for me to have valid reasons for wanting her launched into space.

Woah, woah, woah, woah, woah, woah... woah...

Toyota Jan is a piece of shit

I'm not here to defend her or Toyota. You all can feel however you want. But she is hot.

It's not her looks that are repugnant.

AT&T girl is a whole different story. Yes.

If we're going to throw them all into a Thunderdome, don't forget the girl from Wendy's.

Now her I can't stand. Wouldn't touch her with Yeti's dick.

She sucks too. She's awful.

To be clear, the AT&T girl is very nice.

She played Gilfoyle's satanic girlfriend on Silicon Valley.

That is a sequence of words that makes sense to some people, I'm sure.

I am one such person and was very excited when I saw her appear.

[Oleg]

I have always hated that fat fuck Jared from Subway. In Indy it's common to see him hanging around downtown, especially at sporting events with his dorky friends. They get approached by people who are impressed by him. He's supposed to be promoting some healthy diet of bread and meat but every time I saw him he was fat and drunk and ugly as homemade sin.

I once saw him at a Colts game sitting in a section below mine. I was in the front row of the balcony at the old Hoosier/RCA Dump and he was in the front ass row with his crew of (child oggling) derelicts. People were yelling to him and he kept turning around to wave. At one perfectly calm moment, I yelled, "HEY JARED!" He turned around and looked right at me and I yelled, "GET A JOB!" Hilarity ensued.

I can't explain it but there was always something phony about him. His on-screen persona didn't mesh with his beer guzzling fat ass frat boy ways and actions. I always figured he would have been some sort of white collar thief if it weren't for his fame. But I didn't suspect this. He sickens me about as much as any human I've ever seen in real life.

Fuck him, fuck Subway, fuck the Colts.

Sterling likes this.  I've always hated him too, but now I actually have sensible reasons.

Hey man, I think hating him just for being a creepy fat dude who became famous by eating sawdust bread sandwiches three times a day and going on TV to talk about it was perfectly sensible. I don't need Jan from Toyota to get caught selling meth for me to have valid reasons for wanting her launched into space.

Woah, woah, woah, woah, woah, woah... woah...

Toyota Jan is a piece of shit

I'm not here to defend her or Toyota. You all can feel however you want. But she is hot.

It's not her looks that are repugnant.

AT&T girl is a whole different story. Yes.

If we're going to throw them all into a Thunderdome, don't forget the girl from Wendy's.

Now her I can't stand. Wouldn't touch her with Yeti's dick.

She sucks too. She's awful.

To be clear, the AT&T girl is very nice.

She played Gilfoyle's satanic girlfriend on Silicon Valley.

That is a sequence of words that makes sense to some people, I'm sure.

I am one such person and was very excited when I saw her appear.

And I thought the show was pretty hilarious.

[Bort]

I have always hated that fat fuck Jared from Subway. In Indy it's common to see him hanging around downtown, especially at sporting events with his dorky friends. They get approached by people who are impressed by him. He's supposed to be promoting some healthy diet of bread and meat but every time I saw him he was fat and drunk and ugly as homemade sin.

I once saw him at a Colts game sitting in a section below mine. I was in the front row of the balcony at the old Hoosier/RCA Dump and he was in the front ass row with his crew of (child oggling) derelicts. People were yelling to him and he kept turning around to wave. At one perfectly calm moment, I yelled, "HEY JARED!" He turned around and looked right at me and I yelled, "GET A JOB!" Hilarity ensued.

I can't explain it but there was always something phony about him. His on-screen persona didn't mesh with his beer guzzling fat ass frat boy ways and actions. I always figured he would have been some sort of white collar thief if it weren't for his fame. But I didn't suspect this. He sickens me about as much as any human I've ever seen in real life.

Fuck him, fuck Subway, fuck the Colts.

Sterling likes this.  I've always hated him too, but now I actually have sensible reasons.

Hey man, I think hating him just for being a creepy fat dude who became famous by eating sawdust bread sandwiches three times a day and going on TV to talk about it was perfectly sensible. I don't need Jan from Toyota to get caught selling meth for me to have valid reasons for wanting her launched into space.

Woah, woah, woah, woah, woah, woah... woah...

Toyota Jan is a piece of shit

I'm not here to defend her or Toyota. You all can feel however you want. But she is hot.

It's not her looks that are repugnant.

AT&T girl is a whole different story. Yes.

If we're going to throw them all into a Thunderdome, don't forget the girl from Wendy's.

Now her I can't stand. Wouldn't touch her with Yeti's dick.

She sucks too. She's awful.

To be clear, the AT&T girl is very nice.

She played Gilfoyle's satanic girlfriend on Silicon Valley.

That is a sequence of words that makes sense to some people, I'm sure.

I am one such person and was very excited when I saw her appear.

And I thought the show was pretty hilarious.

I was more commenting on my own out-of-touch-Stewishness.

[CBStew]

I have always hated that fat fuck Jared from Subway. In Indy it's common to see him hanging around downtown, especially at sporting events with his dorky friends. They get approached by people who are impressed by him. He's supposed to be promoting some healthy diet of bread and meat but every time I saw him he was fat and drunk and ugly as homemade sin.

I once saw him at a Colts game sitting in a section below mine. I was in the front row of the balcony at the old Hoosier/RCA Dump and he was in the front ass row with his crew of (child oggling) derelicts. People were yelling to him and he kept turning around to wave. At one perfectly calm moment, I yelled, "HEY JARED!" He turned around and looked right at me and I yelled, "GET A JOB!" Hilarity ensued.

I can't explain it but there was always something phony about him. His on-screen persona didn't mesh with his beer guzzling fat ass frat boy ways and actions. I always figured he would have been some sort of white collar thief if it weren't for his fame. But I didn't suspect this. He sickens me about as much as any human I've ever seen in real life.

Fuck him, fuck Subway, fuck the Colts.

Sterling likes this.  I've always hated him too, but now I actually have sensible reasons.

Hey man, I think hating him just for being a creepy fat dude who became famous by eating sawdust bread sandwiches three times a day and going on TV to talk about it was perfectly sensible. I don't need Jan from Toyota to get caught selling meth for me to have valid reasons for wanting her launched into space.

Woah, woah, woah, woah, woah, woah... woah...

Toyota Jan is a piece of shit

I'm not here to defend her or Toyota. You all can feel however you want. But she is hot.

It's not her looks that are repugnant.

AT&T girl is a whole different story. Yes.

If we're going to throw them all into a Thunderdome, don't forget the girl from Wendy's.

Now her I can't stand. Wouldn't touch her with Yeti's dick.

She sucks too. She's awful.

To be clear, the AT&T girl is very nice.

She played Gilfoyle's satanic girlfriend on Silicon Valley.

That is a sequence of words that makes sense to some people, I'm sure.

I am one such person and was very excited when I saw her appear.

And I thought the show was pretty hilarious.

I was more commenting on my own out-of-touch-Stewishness.

As I read through this thread I was thinking the exact same thing.