Cubs' Prospects FUTUREBONER thread

[ChuckD]

Here's something else - if SKOwarber pans out, he and Rizzo will be the Cubs' two legit lefthanded power bats together for the first time in...ever?

Henry Rodriguez and, uh, Mark Grace?  Tyler Houston?  Okay, ever is fair.

Fred McGriff and Corey Patterson.

I think the Bellhop had more HRs from the port side in 2002.

And McStiff eats ass.

No bullshit guys, I went back to, like Billy Williams and Johnny Callison to find two LH hitters that combined for at least 60 HRs - and that was only because Williams had over 40.

I went back to the 30's thinking maybe Riggs Stephenson and Kiki Cuyler would prove you wrong but, though they were both exceptional hitters (.336/.407 and .323/.382 career BA/OBP, respectively) on pennant-winning and pennant-contending teams,

1) Neither were power hitters
2) Neither were left-handed

In fact, the only true left-handed hitting power hitter on the Last Consistently Contending Cubs Teams was Chuck Klein, who only played for them for them for parts of 3 seasons.

That is to say...Fork is correct?

Intrepid Reader: Billy Williams (426 HRs)

Now, ain't that some shit?

Sorry, I guess I should have qualified my definition of "contending" to include "at least 1 FUCKING measly trip to the postseason".

Billy Williams: Not a winner.

Not what i'm saying--I freakin' love Billy Williams and I actually loathe the Joe Morgan Argument About Chammenships Being a Factor In Rating Individual Players(TM).

I've just grown so allergic to the Durocher-Era Cubs of the late 60's/early 70's I don't put them on the same level as the McCarthy/Grimm-era Cubs of the late 20's/early 30's (who could be considered chumps in their own right for losing all 4 of their trips to the World Series betwwen '29 and '38 but at least they made the goddamned thing)

Says you! I also remember watching the McCarthy/Grimm-era Cubs at the local Juice Joints. Those lads were the real McCoy! Aside from those 5 trips to the Series, they could never seem to hit on all sixes! Bad eggs and rag-a-muffins, the lot of 'em!

[Slaky]

Here's something else - if SKOwarber pans out, he and Rizzo will be the Cubs' two legit lefthanded power bats together for the first time in...ever?

Henry Rodriguez and, uh, Mark Grace?  Tyler Houston?  Okay, ever is fair.

Fred McGriff and Corey Patterson.

I think the Bellhop had more HRs from the port side in 2002.

And McStiff eats ass.

No bullshit guys, I went back to, like Billy Williams and Johnny Callison to find two LH hitters that combined for at least 60 HRs - and that was only because Williams had over 40.

I went back to the 30's thinking maybe Riggs Stephenson and Kiki Cuyler would prove you wrong but, though they were both exceptional hitters (.336/.407 and .323/.382 career BA/OBP, respectively) on pennant-winning and pennant-contending teams,

1) Neither were power hitters
2) Neither were left-handed

In fact, the only true left-handed hitting power hitter on the Last Consistently Contending Cubs Teams was Chuck Klein, who only played for them for them for parts of 3 seasons.

That is to say...Fork is correct?

Intrepid Reader: Billy Williams (426 HRs)

Now, ain't that some shit?

Sorry, I guess I should have qualified my definition of "contending" to include "at least 1 FUCKING measly trip to the postseason".

Billy Williams: Not a winner.

Not what i'm saying--I freakin' love Billy Williams and I actually loathe the Joe Morgan Argument About Chammenships Being a Factor In Rating Individual Players(TM).

I've just grown so allergic to the Durocher-Era Cubs of the late 60's/early 70's I don't put them on the same level as the McCarthy/Grimm-era Cubs of the late 20's/early 30's (who could be considered chumps in their own right for losing all 4 of their trips to the World Series betwwen '29 and '38 but at least they made the goddamned thing)

Says you! I also remember watching the McCarthy/Grimm-era Cubs at the local Juice Joints. Those lads were the real McCoy! Aside from those 5 trips to the Series, they could never seem to hit on all sixes! Bad eggs and rag-a-muffins, the lot of 'em!

RT/fav

[R-V]

Here's something else - if SKOwarber pans out, he and Rizzo will be the Cubs' two legit lefthanded power bats together for the first time in...ever?

Henry Rodriguez and, uh, Mark Grace?  Tyler Houston?  Okay, ever is fair.

Fred McGriff and Corey Patterson.

I think the Bellhop had more HRs from the port side in 2002.

And McStiff eats ass.

No bullshit guys, I went back to, like Billy Williams and Johnny Callison to find two LH hitters that combined for at least 60 HRs - and that was only because Williams had over 40.

I went back to the 30's thinking maybe Riggs Stephenson and Kiki Cuyler would prove you wrong but, though they were both exceptional hitters (.336/.407 and .323/.382 career BA/OBP, respectively) on pennant-winning and pennant-contending teams,

1) Neither were power hitters
2) Neither were left-handed

In fact, the only true left-handed hitting power hitter on the Last Consistently Contending Cubs Teams was Chuck Klein, who only played for them for them for parts of 3 seasons.

That is to say...Fork is correct?

Intrepid Reader: Billy Williams (426 HRs)

Now, ain't that some shit?

Sorry, I guess I should have qualified my definition of "contending" to include "at least 1 FUCKING measly trip to the postseason".

Billy Williams: Not a winner.

No balls. No heart.

Figures RV would equate Edwin Jackson to Billy Williams.  Dude fucking loves Edwin Jackson.

RV--stop riding EJax' manhammer so joyously, man.  It's embarassing.  

Huey is not a meatball and is very comfortable with the mental image of me riding Edwin Jackson's meathammer.

[World's #1 Astros Fan]

Here's something else - if SKOwarber pans out, he and Rizzo will be the Cubs' two legit lefthanded power bats together for the first time in...ever?

Henry Rodriguez and, uh, Mark Grace?  Tyler Houston?  Okay, ever is fair.

Fred McGriff and Corey Patterson.

I think the Bellhop had more HRs from the port side in 2002.

And McStiff eats ass.

No bullshit guys, I went back to, like Billy Williams and Johnny Callison to find two LH hitters that combined for at least 60 HRs - and that was only because Williams had over 40.

I went back to the 30's thinking maybe Riggs Stephenson and Kiki Cuyler would prove you wrong but, though they were both exceptional hitters (.336/.407 and .323/.382 career BA/OBP, respectively) on pennant-winning and pennant-contending teams,

1) Neither were power hitters
2) Neither were left-handed

In fact, the only true left-handed hitting power hitter on the Last Consistently Contending Cubs Teams was Chuck Klein, who only played for them for them for parts of 3 seasons.

That is to say...Fork is correct?

Intrepid Reader: Billy Williams (426 HRs)

Now, ain't that some shit?

Sorry, I guess I should have qualified my definition of "contending" to include "at least 1 FUCKING measly trip to the postseason".

Billy Williams: Not a winner.

No balls. No heart.

Figures RV would equate Edwin Jackson to Billy Williams.  Dude fucking loves Edwin Jackson.

RV--stop riding EJax' manhammer so joyously, man.  It's embarassing.  

Huey is not a meatball and is very comfortable with the mental image of me riding Edwin Jackson's meathammer.

It beats the mental image of you riding my proverbial ballsack, considering nearly 1-in-3 of your posts here are geared toward trolling/stick-poking me.

[SKO]

So everyone else just took from that exchange that the two things Huey spends the most time thinking about are RV riding himself or RV riding Edwin Jackson, right?

[World's #1 Astros Fan]

So everyone else just took from that exchange that the two things Huey spends the most time thinking about are RV riding himself or RV riding Edwin Jackson, right?

Wouldn't we just call that masturbation?

[R-V]

So everyone else just took from that exchange that the two things Huey spends the most time thinking about are RV riding himself or RV riding Edwin Jackson, right?

Wouldn't we just call that masturbation?

I'm too busy entertaining myself with the image of you printing out my posts and sorting them into Huey and non-Huey piles to worry about something as trivial as a Jed Hoyer-style spank session.

[World's #1 Astros Fan]

So everyone else just took from that exchange that the two things Huey spends the most time thinking about are RV riding himself or RV riding Edwin Jackson, right?

Wouldn't we just call that masturbation?

I'm too busy entertaining myself with the image of you printing out my posts and sorting them into Huey and non-Huey piles to worry about something as trivial as a Jed Hoyer-style spank session.

Oooh wicked burn.

[InternetApex]

So everyone else just took from that exchange that the two things Huey spends the most time thinking about are RV riding himself or RV riding Edwin Jackson, right?

Wouldn't we just call that masturbation?

Honestly, no. It's not really anatomically possible to ride one's self. Believe me, I've tried. What one must do is clone one's self or create a very lifelike model for the purpose of finding out what it would be like to actually go and fuck one's self. I'm workshopping all this and I'll vlog about it later on another forum.

[Quality Start Machine]

So everyone else just took from that exchange that the two things Huey spends the most time thinking about are RV riding himself or RV riding Edwin Jackson, right?

Wouldn't we just call that masturbation?

Honestly, no. It's not really anatomically possible to ride one's self. Believe me, I've tried. What one must do is clone one's self or create a very lifelike model for the purpose of finding out what it would be like to actually go and fuck one's self. I'm workshopping all this and I'll vlog about it later on another forum.

Maybe the source if Huey's rage is that he's too big for self-riding.

[World's #1 Astros Fan]

So everyone else just took from that exchange that the two things Huey spends the most time thinking about are RV riding himself or RV riding Edwin Jackson, right?

Wouldn't we just call that masturbation?

Honestly, no. It's not really anatomically possible to ride one's self. Believe me, I've tried. What one must do is clone one's self or create a very lifelike model for the purpose of finding out what it would be like to actually go and fuck one's self. I'm workshopping all this and I'll vlog about it later on another forum.

Maybe the source if Huey's rage is that he's too big for self-riding.

The whole "if"?

[Quality Start Machine]

So everyone else just took from that exchange that the two things Huey spends the most time thinking about are RV riding himself or RV riding Edwin Jackson, right?

Wouldn't we just call that masturbation?

Honestly, no. It's not really anatomically possible to ride one's self. Believe me, I've tried. What one must do is clone one's self or create a very lifelike model for the purpose of finding out what it would be like to actually go and fuck one's self. I'm workshopping all this and I'll vlog about it later on another forum.

Maybe the source if Huey's rage is that he's too big for self-riding.

The whole "if"?

adn nohting btu teh if.

[J. Walter Weatherman]

Huey is not a meatball and is very comfortable with the mental image of me riding Edwin Jackson's meathammer.

It beats the mental image of you riding my proverbial ballsack, considering nearly 1-in-3 of your posts here are geared toward trolling/stick-poking me.

Sounds like someone's un-friending finger is getting itchy.

[CT III]

Huey is not a meatball and is very comfortable with the mental image of me riding Edwin Jackson's meathammer.

It beats the mental image of you riding my proverbial ballsack, considering nearly 1-in-3 of your posts here are geared toward trolling/stick-poking me.

Sounds like someone's un-friending finger is getting itchy.

Itchy's a jerk.

[Bort]

Huey is not a meatball and is very comfortable with the mental image of me riding Edwin Jackson's meathammer.

It beats the mental image of you riding my proverbial ballsack, considering nearly 1-in-3 of your posts here are geared toward trolling/stick-poking me.

Sounds like someone's un-friending finger is getting itchy.

Itchy's a jerk.

He sure is...