Kris Bryant Firehose of Splooge Thread

[World's #1 Astros Fan]

Home run No. 22. He might as well be in Little League at this point.

Kudos, I guess, to Southern League teams for continuing to pitch to him.

But I'd probably recommend against teeing it up for him like this.

Properly teed up'd.

[thehawk]

Home run No. 22. He might as well be in Little League at this point.

Kudos, I guess, to Southern League teams for continuing to pitch to him.

But I'd probably recommend against teeing it up for him like this.

Properly teed up'd.

I feel like I should beat the rush and buy my Kris Bryant shirsey right now.

[InternetApex]

Home run No. 22. He might as well be in Little League at this point.

Kudos, I guess, to Southern League teams for continuing to pitch to him.

But I'd probably recommend against teeing it up for him like this.

Properly teed up'd.

I feel like I should beat the rush and buy my Kris Bryant shirsey right now.

I feel like waiting until he has a uniform number so I don't look like a total jag later.

[thehawk]

Home run No. 22. He might as well be in Little League at this point.

Kudos, I guess, to Southern League teams for continuing to pitch to him.

But I'd probably recommend against teeing it up for him like this.

Properly teed up'd.

I feel like I should beat the rush and buy my Kris Bryant shirsey right now.

I feel like waiting until he has a uniform number so I don't look like a total jag later.

Well he wears 17 now, and I don't imagine Brandon Hyde standing in his way, nor do I see the Cubs retiring the number for Don Zimmer, Joey Amalfitano, Mark Grace or Felix Pie

[Saul Goodman]

Home run No. 22. He might as well be in Little League at this point.

Kudos, I guess, to Southern League teams for continuing to pitch to him.

But I'd probably recommend against teeing it up for him like this.

Properly teed up'd.

I feel like I should beat the rush and buy my Kris Bryant shirsey right now.

I feel like waiting until he has a uniform number so I don't look like a total jag later.

Just buy one for every number, just in case. Problem solved. As soon as he picks #17 or whatever you'll be the only true fan around.

[Quality Start Machine]

Home run No. 22. He might as well be in Little League at this point.

Kudos, I guess, to Southern League teams for continuing to pitch to him.

But I'd probably recommend against teeing it up for him like this.

Properly teed up'd.

I feel like I should beat the rush and buy my Kris Bryant shirsey right now.

I feel like waiting until he has a uniform number so I don't look like a total jag later.

that train left the station, Hoss.

[World's #1 Astros Fan]

Home run No. 22. He might as well be in Little League at this point.

Kudos, I guess, to Southern League teams for continuing to pitch to him.

But I'd probably recommend against teeing it up for him like this.

Properly teed up'd.

I feel like I should beat the rush and buy my Kris Bryant shirsey right now.

I feel like waiting until he has a uniform number so I don't look like a total jag later.

Well he wears 17 now, and I don't imagine Brandon Hyde standing in his way, nor do I see the Cubs retiring the number for Don Zimmer, Joey Amalfitano, Mark Grace or Felix Pie

Don Zimmer wore #4, I thought.

And didn't Almalfitano wear #5?

Where the HELL'S AL'S FRIEND KASEY WHEN YOU NEED HIM?!?!

[Powdered Toast Man]

Home run No. 22. He might as well be in Little League at this point.

Kudos, I guess, to Southern League teams for continuing to pitch to him.

But I'd probably recommend against teeing it up for him like this.

Properly teed up'd.

I feel like I should beat the rush and buy my Kris Bryant shirsey right now.

I feel like waiting until he has a uniform number so I don't look like a total jag later.

Well he wears 17 now, and I don't imagine Brandon Hyde standing in his way, nor do I see the Cubs retiring the number for Don Zimmer, Joey Amalfitano, Mark Grace or Felix Pie Mike Fontenot

[thehawk]

Home run No. 22. He might as well be in Little League at this point.

Kudos, I guess, to Southern League teams for continuing to pitch to him.

But I'd probably recommend against teeing it up for him like this.

Properly teed up'd.

I feel like I should beat the rush and buy my Kris Bryant shirsey right now.

I feel like waiting until he has a uniform number so I don't look like a total jag later.

Well he wears 17 now, and I don't imagine Brandon Hyde standing in his way, nor do I see the Cubs retiring the number for Don Zimmer, Joey Amalfitano, Mark Grace or Felix Pie

Don Zimmer wore #4, I thought.

And didn't Almalfitano wear #5?

Where the HELL'S AL'S FRIEND KASEY WHEN YOU NEED HIM?!?!

  I think right here (where I got the information)

[J. Walter Weatherman]

Home run No. 22. He might as well be in Little League at this point.

Kudos, I guess, to Southern League teams for continuing to pitch to him.

But I'd probably recommend against teeing it up for him like this.

Properly teed up'd.

I feel like I should beat the rush and buy my Kris Bryant shirsey right now.

I feel like waiting until he has a uniform number so I don't look like a total jag later.

Well he wears 17 now, and I don't imagine Brandon Hyde standing in his way, nor do I see the Cubs retiring the number for Don Zimmer, Joey Amalfitano, Mark Grace or Felix Pie

Don Zimmer wore #4, I thought.

And didn't Almalfitano wear #5?

Where the HELL'S AL'S FRIEND KASEY WHEN YOU NEED HIM?!?!

  I think right here (where I got the information)

Cubs Legend Adam Greenberg

[thehawk]

Home run No. 22. He might as well be in Little League at this point.

Kudos, I guess, to Southern League teams for continuing to pitch to him.

But I'd probably recommend against teeing it up for him like this.

Properly teed up'd.

I feel like I should beat the rush and buy my Kris Bryant shirsey right now.

I feel like waiting until he has a uniform number so I don't look like a total jag later.

Well he wears 17 now, and I don't imagine Brandon Hyde standing in his way, nor do I see the Cubs retiring the number for Don Zimmer, Joey Amalfitano, Mark Grace or Felix Pie

Don Zimmer wore #4, I thought.

And didn't Almalfitano wear #5?

Where the HELL'S AL'S FRIEND KASEY WHEN YOU NEED HIM?!?!

  I think right here (where I got the information)

Cubs Legend Adam  Moonlight Greenberg

fixed that for you

[Yeti]

Home run No. 22. He might as well be in Little League at this point.

Kudos, I guess, to Southern League teams for continuing to pitch to him.

But I'd probably recommend against teeing it up for him like this.

Properly teed up'd.

I feel like I should beat the rush and buy my Kris Bryant shirsey right now.

I feel like waiting until he has a uniform number so I don't look like a total jag later.

Well he wears 17 now, and I don't imagine Brandon Hyde standing in his way, nor do I see the Cubs retiring the number for Don Zimmer, Joey Amalfitano, Mark Grace or Felix Pie

Don Zimmer wore #4, I thought.

And didn't Almalfitano wear #5?

Where the HELL'S AL'S FRIEND KASEY WHEN YOU NEED HIM?!?!

  I think right here (where I got the information)

Cubs Legend Adam  Moonlight Greenberg

fixed that for you

Until the Marlins fucked that up

[World's #1 Astros Fan]

Home run No. 22. He might as well be in Little League at this point.

Kudos, I guess, to Southern League teams for continuing to pitch to him.

But I'd probably recommend against teeing it up for him like this.

Properly teed up'd.

I feel like I should beat the rush and buy my Kris Bryant shirsey right now.

I feel like waiting until he has a uniform number so I don't look like a total jag later.

Well he wears 17 now, and I don't imagine Brandon Hyde standing in his way, nor do I see the Cubs retiring the number for Don Zimmer, Joey Amalfitano, Mark Grace or Felix Pie

Don Zimmer wore #4, I thought.

And didn't Almalfitano wear #5?

Where the HELL'S AL'S FRIEND KASEY WHEN YOU NEED HIM?!?!

  I think right here (where I got the information)

Cubs Legend Adam  Moonlight Greenberg

fixed that for you

Until the Marlins fucked that up

Right.  Now that prideless charity-taker is like a gazillion other non-unique washouts.

[Powdered Toast Man]

Another 2-4 night. No homers this time, though. He's probably going to die, I bet.

[Tony]

Another 2-4 night. No homers this time, though. He's probably going to die, I bet.

He's already dead. That's why he was only able to get 2 regular boring hits.