Kris Bryant Firehose of Splooge Thread

[Saul Goodman]

KRIS FUCKING BRYANT

[R-V]

Per Fangraphs:

15th in offensive WAR
13th in overall WAR
4th in WAR among 3B, with about 10% fewer plate appearances than the top 3
1st in WAR among Cubs, edging out Anthony Damn Rizzo by a hair

And it's just starting to warm up in Chicago. This guy is a hell of a sportsman.

[Saul Goodman]

I was going to bitch about him swinging at everything lately then I relaxed and repeated "he's a rookie" to myself for a few minutes.  He's going to be fine.

[Saul Goodman]

I was going to bitch about him swinging at everything lately then I relaxed and repeated "he's a rookie" to myself for a few minutes.  He's going to be fine.

Still swallowing my anger at that ugly swing-and-miss on a ball right in the middle of the zone with runners on that he should've launched 480 feet.  Hopefully next time he knocks one of Cincy's stupid riverboat stacks over with a line drive dong.

[Slaky]

I was going to bitch about him swinging at everything lately then I relaxed and repeated "he's a rookie" to myself for a few minutes.  He's going to be fine.

Still swallowing my anger at that ugly swing-and-miss on a ball right in the middle of the zone with runners on that he should've launched 480 feet.  Hopefully next time he knocks one of Cincy's stupid riverboat stacks over with a line drive dong.

Him and Rizzo appear to be scuffling. It's not prudent.

[Powdered Toast Man]

My homie Bryant has been having a tough go lately, but a timely single yesterday and some more contact during both games yesterday hopefully means some obliterated baseballs in the future.

By the way, does anyone else notice that Bryant gives the best AB's along with Rizzo in the lineup? I feel like, maybe even to his own detriment, that Bryant more often than not falls behind in the count only to battle back to 3-2...and he does it a lot. I don't have data or really know how to look that up (it's probably not hard, I'm just lazy)...but it FEELS like it...nah mean?

ETA: What I mean by "his own detriment" is that it feels like he misses a lot of hittable pitches early in counts...he'll get a 2-1 FB right where he wants it only to foul it off. He will make it rain baseballs soon my friends.

[Quality Start Machine]

My homie Bryant has been having a tough go lately, but a timely single yesterday and some more contact during both games yesterday hopefully means some obliterated baseballs in the future.

By the way, does anyone else notice that Bryant gives the best AB's along with Rizzo in the lineup? I feel like, maybe even to his own detriment, that Bryant more often than not falls behind in the count only to battle back to 3-2...and he does it a lot. I don't have data or really know how to look that up (it's probably not hard, I'm just lazy)...but it FEELS like it...nah mean?

ETA: What I mean by "his own detriment" is that it feels like he misses a lot of hittable pitches early in counts...he'll get a 2-1 FB right where he wants it only to foul it off. He will make it rain baseballs soon my friends.

That's usually the sign of a guy who is overthinking. If that's the case, I'm sure someone will get him out of his own head pretty soon.

[Saul Goodman]

My homie Bryant has been having a tough go lately, but a timely single yesterday and some more contact during both games yesterday hopefully means some obliterated baseballs in the future.

By the way, does anyone else notice that Bryant gives the best AB's along with Rizzo in the lineup? I feel like, maybe even to his own detriment, that Bryant more often than not falls behind in the count only to battle back to 3-2...and he does it a lot. I don't have data or really know how to look that up (it's probably not hard, I'm just lazy)...but it FEELS like it...nah mean?

ETA: What I mean by "his own detriment" is that it feels like he misses a lot of hittable pitches early in counts...he'll get a 2-1 FB right where he wants it only to foul it off. He will make it rain baseballs soon my friends.

That's usually the sign of a guy who is overthinking. If that's the case, I'm sure someone will get him out of his own head pretty soon.

According to my source (Dan Bernstein), Kris has been out drinking late too many times. I'd say that explains everything. Kids, man.

[InternetApex]

My homie Bryant has been having a tough go lately, but a timely single yesterday and some more contact during both games yesterday hopefully means some obliterated baseballs in the future.

By the way, does anyone else notice that Bryant gives the best AB's along with Rizzo in the lineup? I feel like, maybe even to his own detriment, that Bryant more often than not falls behind in the count only to battle back to 3-2...and he does it a lot. I don't have data or really know how to look that up (it's probably not hard, I'm just lazy)...but it FEELS like it...nah mean?

ETA: What I mean by "his own detriment" is that it feels like he misses a lot of hittable pitches early in counts...he'll get a 2-1 FB right where he wants it only to foul it off. He will make it rain baseballs soon my friends.

That's usually the sign of a guy who is overthinking. If that's the case, I'm sure someone will get him out of his own head pretty soon.

The problem could actually be mechanical. Coomer (I know, I know) pointed out that his head is coming off the ball on a lot of hittable fastballs. Someone asked Maddon about that very thing and he said it might be fatigue-related, which is possible. If a guy is tired, his mechanics can get screwed up.

[Quality Start Machine]

My homie Bryant has been having a tough go lately, but a timely single yesterday and some more contact during both games yesterday hopefully means some obliterated baseballs in the future.

By the way, does anyone else notice that Bryant gives the best AB's along with Rizzo in the lineup? I feel like, maybe even to his own detriment, that Bryant more often than not falls behind in the count only to battle back to 3-2...and he does it a lot. I don't have data or really know how to look that up (it's probably not hard, I'm just lazy)...but it FEELS like it...nah mean?

ETA: What I mean by "his own detriment" is that it feels like he misses a lot of hittable pitches early in counts...he'll get a 2-1 FB right where he wants it only to foul it off. He will make it rain baseballs soon my friends.

That's usually the sign of a guy who is overthinking. If that's the case, I'm sure someone will get him out of his own head pretty soon.

According to my source (Dan Bernstein), Kris has been out drinking late too many times. I'd say that explains everything. Kids, man.

They don't make them like Mickey Mantle any more.

[ChuckD]

My homie Bryant has been having a tough go lately, but a timely single yesterday and some more contact during both games yesterday hopefully means some obliterated baseballs in the future.

By the way, does anyone else notice that Bryant gives the best AB's along with Rizzo in the lineup? I feel like, maybe even to his own detriment, that Bryant more often than not falls behind in the count only to battle back to 3-2...and he does it a lot. I don't have data or really know how to look that up (it's probably not hard, I'm just lazy)...but it FEELS like it...nah mean?

ETA: What I mean by "his own detriment" is that it feels like he misses a lot of hittable pitches early in counts...he'll get a 2-1 FB right where he wants it only to foul it off. He will make it rain baseballs soon my friends.

That's usually the sign of a guy who is overthinking. If that's the case, I'm sure someone will get him out of his own head pretty soon.

According to my source (Dan Bernstein), Kris has been out drinking late too many times. I'd say that explains everything. Kids, man.

They don't make them like *Mickey Mantle any more.

* The All-American Boy

[SKO]

My homie Bryant has been having a tough go lately, but a timely single yesterday and some more contact during both games yesterday hopefully means some obliterated baseballs in the future.

By the way, does anyone else notice that Bryant gives the best AB's along with Rizzo in the lineup? I feel like, maybe even to his own detriment, that Bryant more often than not falls behind in the count only to battle back to 3-2...and he does it a lot. I don't have data or really know how to look that up (it's probably not hard, I'm just lazy)...but it FEELS like it...nah mean?

ETA: What I mean by "his own detriment" is that it feels like he misses a lot of hittable pitches early in counts...he'll get a 2-1 FB right where he wants it only to foul it off. He will make it rain baseballs soon my friends.

That's usually the sign of a guy who is overthinking. If that's the case, I'm sure someone will get him out of his own head pretty soon.

The problem could actually be mechanical. Coomer (I know, I know) pointed out that his head is coming off the ball on a lot of hittable fastballs. Someone asked Maddon about that very thing and he said it might be fatigue-related, which is possible. If a guy is tired, his mechanics can get screwed up.

I think there's some truth to this. Dude just looks tired sometimes. Another reason why it would be nice if Mike Olt or Mendy could have gotten their shit together or La Stella hadn't died. Really hard to give Bryant a true breather if the replacement is Jonathan Herrera and you're struggling to score runs.

[World's #1 Astros Fan]

My homie Bryant has been having a tough go lately, but a timely single yesterday and some more contact during both games yesterday hopefully means some obliterated baseballs in the future.

By the way, does anyone else notice that Bryant gives the best AB's along with Rizzo in the lineup? I feel like, maybe even to his own detriment, that Bryant more often than not falls behind in the count only to battle back to 3-2...and he does it a lot. I don't have data or really know how to look that up (it's probably not hard, I'm just lazy)...but it FEELS like it...nah mean?

ETA: What I mean by "his own detriment" is that it feels like he misses a lot of hittable pitches early in counts...he'll get a 2-1 FB right where he wants it only to foul it off. He will make it rain baseballs soon my friends.

That's usually the sign of a guy who is overthinking. If that's the case, I'm sure someone will get him out of his own head pretty soon.

According to my source (Dan Bernstein), Kris has been out drinking late too many times. I'd say that explains everything. Kids, man.

They don't make them like *Mickey Mantle any more.

* The All-American Boy

For starters, I thought Bryant didn't drink.  Or is that just a lie?  Or did he start drinking and just can't handle it?

For another, not to go all Fork-with-an-ACL-tear but I used to play on a Sunday morning softball team when I was in my 20's and used to have my best games after a long night of boozing.  Conversely, when I would stay in and rest up--like before a playoff game--I never played as well. Couldn't really explain it other than when you're fatigued and hungover you think less and react more.  I dunno.  I think even if you're a lightweight, as long as you're in your 20's, being hungover shouldn't really effect your play, unless you have the shits or something.

In short, I think this suggestion is as wrong as it is malicious.  Knock it off, fucksticks.  All players struggle, even exceptional rookies.

[SKO]

Yeah I really think the "what's wrong with him?" stuff is overblown. He's a rookie, and he's one that strikes out 30% of the time even when he's going well, so his slumps are going to look uglier than most because you notice the brutal K's more when he's not mashing the ball off or over the wall in his other 3 at bats a game. He'll get hot again and crush some long dongs and we'll forget all about it.

I'm more confused by the Rizzo slump, because a guy who went from chasing basically nothing the first couple months of the season has chased a lot of junk outside the zone lately, and that seems weird to me. It's possible he's just pressing, but I just don't know why he'd have ever changed his approach.

[InternetApex]

Yeah I really think the "what's wrong with him?" stuff is overblown. He's a rookie, and he's one that strikes out 30% of the time even when he's going well, so his slumps are going to look uglier than most because you notice the brutal K's more when he's not mashing the ball off or over the wall in his other 3 at bats a game. He'll get hot again and crush some long dongs and we'll forget all about it.

I'm more confused by the Rizzo slump, because a guy who went from chasing basically nothing the first couple months of the season has chased a lot of junk outside the zone lately, and that seems weird to me. It's possible he's just pressing, but I just don't know why he'd have ever changed his approach.

I think it's obvious that the home run derby has killed them in the second half and that they're both drunk a lot and they should trade them.