Kris Bryant Firehose of Splooge Thread

[Eli]

DPD but man what a damn shame Grady Sizemore's career was. Averaged 6.2 bWAR in his four full seasons through age 25, then played just 419 more games the rest of his career.

Get this negativity the fuck out of the Kris Bryant thread. Why aren't you appreciating him more, you jerk? This is the thread where we appreciate him, not jinx him by bringing up failures. Someone should have told you.

Kris Bryant is what Grady Sizemore should have been. If he played 3rd. And was made of steel.

Troy Glaus had a 15.4 WAR his 23-25 age seasons.

That's pretty damn impressive!

[Tonker]

DPD but man what a damn shame Grady Sizemore's career was. Averaged 6.2 bWAR in his four full seasons through age 25, then played just 419 more games the rest of his career.

Get this negativity the fuck out of the Kris Bryant thread. Why aren't you appreciating him more, you jerk? This is the thread where we appreciate him, not jinx him by bringing up failures. Someone should have told you.

Kris Bryant is what Grady Sizemore should have been. If he played 3rd. And was made of steel.

Troy Glaus had a 15.4 WAR his 23-25 age seasons.

Of all the Pens Foe on this site, you are the Pennest Foe.

I heartily positive this exchange.  Well done to all concerned.

[SKO]

This dude is so quietly and calmly excellent every day that we almost never even bump this thread, and he's second only to Harper in the NL in wRC+ this year (199) despite him hitting only 2 homers to Harper's 7. A dude that was supposed to be a Three True Outcomes Slugger is now a legit triple crown threat who doesn't rely on homers for his value.

[Quality Start Machine]

This dude is so quietly and calmly excellent every day that we almost never even bump this thread, and he's second only to Harper in the NL in wRC+ this year (199) despite him hitting only 2 homers to Harper's 7. A dude that was supposed to be a Three True Outcomes Slugger is now a legit triple crown threat who doesn't rely on homers for his value.

Except nobody cares about RBI or batting average any more.

Nice choice, Jim.

[Yeti]

This dude is so quietly and calmly excellent every day that we almost never even bump this thread, and he's second only to Harper in the NL in wRC+ this year (199) despite him hitting only 2 homers to Harper's 7. A dude that was supposed to be a Three True Outcomes Slugger is now a legit triple crown threat who doesn't rely on homers for his value.

I'm going to call bullshit on the Triple Crown threat. His hit profile has surpassed that of Scott Rolen, but he hasn't finished a season over .300 and had 73 RBI last year. I'd think he'd need a season or two of .320 BA and multiple seasons of 110-120+ RBI for him to be considered a guy who would lead those categories.

More importantly, those categories are garbage and he's a stud hitter.

[CBStew]

This dude is so quietly and calmly excellent every day that we almost never even bump this thread, and he's second only to Harper in the NL in wRC+ this year (199) despite him hitting only 2 homers to Harper's 7. A dude that was supposed to be a Three True Outcomes Slugger is now a legit triple crown threat who doesn't rely on homers for his value.

Except nobody cares about RBI or batting average any more.

Nice choice, Jim.

At first glance I saw  "Except nobody cares about FBI..."  I was about to comment, but my eyes refocused.

[Saul Goodman]

"Fuck you, but very respectfully; I mean no offense, and I hope we can still be friends off the field." - Kris Bryant to MLB pitchers

[Quality Start Machine]

Stealing second, then taking third because the shift for Rizzo left the bag uncovered.

He is just so fucking good at everything.

[SKO]

Stealing second, then taking third because the shift for Rizzo left the bag uncovered.

He is just so fucking good at everything.

He's currently stuck in one of the longest homerless streaks of his career, 18 games. It has lowered his OPS to a pathetic...uhhh... .918. He's so fucking good that's the floor.

[PenFoe]

Stealing second, then taking third because the shift for Rizzo left the bag uncovered.

He is just so fucking good at everything.

He's currently stuck in one of the longest homerless streaks of his career, 18 games. It has lowered his OPS to a pathetic...uhhh... .918. He's so fucking good that's the floor.

Troy Glaus only had one full season over .918 in his entire career.

[Quality Start Machine]

Stealing second, then taking third because the shift for Rizzo left the bag uncovered.

He is just so fucking good at everything.

He's currently stuck in one of the longest homerless streaks of his career, 18 games. It has lowered his OPS to a pathetic...uhhh... .918. He's so fucking good that's the floor.

Troy Glaus only had one full season over .918 in his entire career.

Yeah, but maybe that year it was 3.000 - you ever think of that?

[Saul Goodman]

He's baaaaaaaaaack

[Chuck to Chuck]

He's dead.

[Quality Start Machine]

He's dead.

bump for Zombie Bryant not only homering, but the rare oppo.