Kyle SKOwarber Hulking Thread of Sploogepower

[Slaky]

I......HOLY.....BALL.....FUCK....MAN

Kyle Schwarber, the original holy ball-fuck man.

I'm over the moon about this kid.

He honestly believes he's going to hit a homer every time he's up. A full season of Schwarber next year yields, what...45 homers? How could it not?

[Quality Start Machine]

I swear I've watched yesterday's HR at least 20 times. I love the commentary from the TBS guys...

"Mercy"

"What in the world..."

(silence)

[SKO]

I think Schwarber should get the ball or whatever he wants to do with it but I'd like some kind of marker placed on the spot on top of the scoreboard like a bronze baseball or something. Anything to serve as warning to pitchers. Abandon hope all ye who pitch to Babe Fuckin Ruth.

[ChuckD]

I think Schwarber should get the ball or whatever he wants to do with it but I'd like some kind of marker placed on the spot on top of the scoreboard like a bronze baseball or something. Anything to serve as warning to pitchers. Abandon hope all ye who pitch to Babe Fuckin Ruth.

Fuck it. Just rename it the Schwarboard.

[SKO]

I think Schwarber should get the ball or whatever he wants to do with it but I'd like some kind of marker placed on the spot on top of the scoreboard like a bronze baseball or something. Anything to serve as warning to pitchers. Abandon hope all ye who pitch to Babe Fuckin Ruth.

Fuck it. Just rename it the Schwarboard.

WINNER

[thehawk]

I think Schwarber should get the ball or whatever he wants to do with it but I'd like some kind of marker placed on the spot on top of the scoreboard like a bronze baseball or something. Anything to serve as warning to pitchers. Abandon hope all ye who pitch to Babe Fuckin Ruth.

Fuck it. Just rename it the Schwarboard.

WINNER

Drop the mike Chuck, you nailed it.

[Saul Goodman]

I think Schwarber should get the ball or whatever he wants to do with it but I'd like some kind of marker placed on the spot on top of the scoreboard like a bronze baseball or something. Anything to serve as warning to pitchers. Abandon hope all ye who pitch to Babe Fuckin Ruth.

The bronze baseball should be large and translucent and light up for every Schwarber home run. Pitchers will see it in their nightmares.

[thehawk]

Looks like the ball is staying up there through the playoffs at least

http://deadspin.com/the-cubs-will-leave-kyle-schwarbers-home-run-ball-on-to-1736492625

[CT III]

Screw that, leave it up there forever.  Anything to keep it out of Grant DePorter's sweaty mitts.

[ChuckD]

Screw that, leave it up there forever.  Anything to keep it out of Grant DePorter's sweaty mitts.

It's going to get lonely up there all by itself. Can't wait for Schwarber to provide it with some company.

[Quality Start Machine]

Screw that, leave it up there forever.  Anything to keep it out of Grant DePorter's sweaty mitts.

It's going to get lonely up there all by itself. Can't wait for Schwarber to provide it with some company.

I'm thinking Rizzo sees it as a challenge.

[Quality Start Machine]

I think Schwarber should get the ball or whatever he wants to do with it but I'd like some kind of marker placed on the spot on top of the scoreboard like a bronze baseball or something. Anything to serve as warning to pitchers. Abandon hope all ye who pitch to Babe Fuckin Ruth.

Fuck it. Just rename it the Schwarboard.

Let's get Bruce Miles' secretary on the line.

[Canadouche]

Similarly, I would like to start calling him Schwabe Ruth.

[thehawk]

http://deadspin.com/kyle-schwarber-was-once-a-high-school-show-choir-stud-1736920341

[SKO]

http://deadspin.com/kyle-schwarber-was-once-a-high-school-show-choir-stud-1736920341

God damn I love everyone of these stupid kids.