2014 General NFL Thread

[World's #1 Astros Fan]

I'm gonna have to give Slaky a pass, because, for a man, there really isn't much to do during most of labor but sit around. And the first few months of fatherhood for me were spent being up at weird hours, not having anything better to do, and tweeting about bullshit. Hell, none of that Holiday Road crap would've happened if I actually was sleeping normal hours.

There's also the ADD.

[Eli]

I'm gonna have to give Slaky a pass, because, for a man, there really isn't much to do during most of labor but sit around.

Yep. Literally sitting there waiting.

I find these viewpoints surprising.

Seriously. Ali's water broke at like 2am, and my son wasn't born until 8:54pm. Most of the time in between was spent waiting for her to dilate/efface (they eventually gave up and she had a c-section). There were literally hours where we basically hung out in the delivery room.

Yeah, it's just funny how different things can be -- Julie's water broke a little after 9 p.m. and the baby was out at 2:02 a.m. So, about 4 1/2 hours from sitting on our couch watching TV to holding a baby, which gave us actual sitcommy-throw-things-in-a-bag labor ("Where are the keys?!" "You're holding them!" *laugh track*). I don't think I even found my phone until I needed it to take pictures.

#DesipioBirthStories

[Quality Start Machine]

I wasn't even there when SKO was born.

[Yeti]

I'm gonna have to give Slaky a pass, because, for a man, there really isn't much to do during most of labor but sit around. And the first few months of fatherhood for me were spent being up at weird hours, not having anything better to do, and tweeting about bullshit. Hell, none of that Holiday Road crap would've happened if I actually was sleeping normal hours.

As for the NFL, I have always been such a borderline football viewer that a combination of a terrible Bears team and absolute human garbage getting away with practically everything they do in this sport has left me not giving a tin shit this year.

I give him a pass, too, but that doesn't mean I don't love ChuckD busting his balls

[ChuckD]

I'm gonna have to give Slaky a pass, because, for a man, there really isn't much to do during most of labor but sit around. And the first few months of fatherhood for me were spent being up at weird hours, not having anything better to do, and tweeting about bullshit. Hell, none of that Holiday Road crap would've happened if I actually was sleeping normal hours.

As for the NFL, I have always been such a borderline football viewer that a combination of a terrible Bears team and absolute human garbage getting away with practically everything they do in this sport has left me not giving a tin shit this year.

I give him a pass, too, but that doesn't mean I don't love ChuckD busting his balls

Oh, I'm not criticizing. I'll probably be doing similarly when we have a kid. Just thought it was funny and totally befitting Slak's status as an up-and-coming Vine star.

[Tonker]

I'm gonna have to give Slaky a pass, because, for a man, there really isn't much to do during most of labor but sit around. And the first few months of fatherhood for me were spent being up at weird hours, not having anything better to do, and tweeting about bullshit. Hell, none of that Holiday Road crap would've happened if I actually was sleeping normal hours.

As for the NFL, I have always been such a borderline football viewer that a combination of a terrible Bears team and absolute human garbage getting away with practically everything they do in this sport has left me not giving a tin shit this year.

I give him a pass, too, but that doesn't mean I don't love ChuckD busting his balls

Oh, I'm not criticizing. I'll probably be doing similarly when we have a kid. Just thought it was funny and totally befitting Slak's status as an up-and-coming Vine star.

And there was me thinking you were one of those "our dog is our kid" kind of guys.

[InternetApex]

I'm gonna have to give Slaky a pass, because, for a man, there really isn't much to do during most of labor but sit around. And the first few months of fatherhood for me were spent being up at weird hours, not having anything better to do, and tweeting about bullshit. Hell, none of that Holiday Road crap would've happened if I actually was sleeping normal hours.

As for the NFL, I have always been such a borderline football viewer that a combination of a terrible Bears team and absolute human garbage getting away with practically everything they do in this sport has left me not giving a tin shit this year.

I give him a pass, too, but that doesn't mean I don't love ChuckD busting his balls

Oh, I'm not criticizing. I'll probably be doing similarly when we have a kid. Just thought it was funny and totally befitting Slak's status as an up-and-coming Vine star.

And there was me thinking you were one of those "our dog is our kid" kind of guys.

Our dog is our kid. We leave her in the house all day while we live our lives. And when the world turns to soft-serve shit in a couple years she'll be ready to check out leaving only us to suffer as we abandon every semblance of the materialistic life in the 20/21st centuries. Let the world collapse around us. Who cares? I got this all figured out.

[Chuck to Chuck]

First Murton: Pitocin at 8 AM, kid at 4 PM. Lotsa napping by both.

Second Murton: Version at 4 PM (worked), pitocin at 4:30.  Went to grab a sandwich at 5:30. Back at 6:15. At 6:30, OB comes in and says, "Finish quickly." Kid at 7.

Third Murton: Pitocin at 7 AM. Nap from 8 to 9:30. Kid out at 10:15.

[World's #1 Astros Fan]

I'm gonna have to give Slaky a pass, because, for a man, there really isn't much to do during most of labor but sit around. And the first few months of fatherhood for me were spent being up at weird hours, not having anything better to do, and tweeting about bullshit. Hell, none of that Holiday Road crap would've happened if I actually was sleeping normal hours.

As for the NFL, I have always been such a borderline football viewer that a combination of a terrible Bears team and absolute human garbage getting away with practically everything they do in this sport has left me not giving a tin shit this year.

I give him a pass, too, but that doesn't mean I don't love ChuckD busting his balls

Oh, I'm not criticizing. I'll probably be doing similarly when we have a kid. Just thought it was funny and totally befitting Slak's status as an up-and-coming Vine star.

And there was me thinking you were one of those "our dog is our kid" kind of guys.

Those people truly are the worst.

YOU'RE NOT YOUR DOG'S "FATHER"

[Eli]

Those people truly are the worst.

YOU'RE NOT YOUR DOG'S "FATHER"

Co-signed.

[Eli]

And there was me thinking you were one of those "our dog is our kid" kind of guys.

Also, I had somehow assumed this was more of an American culture thing. Apparently not?

[World's #1 Astros Fan]

And there was me thinking you were one of those "our dog is our kid" kind of guys.

Also, I had somehow assumed this was more of an American culture thing. Apparently not?

Unless Tonk is observing all this American behavior on FB.

OTOH I have a cousin in London whose wife shares the same level of zeal that many animal-lovers in the States possess so perhaps it is more global than I first thought.

[ChuckD]

I'm gonna have to give Slaky a pass, because, for a man, there really isn't much to do during most of labor but sit around. And the first few months of fatherhood for me were spent being up at weird hours, not having anything better to do, and tweeting about bullshit. Hell, none of that Holiday Road crap would've happened if I actually was sleeping normal hours.

As for the NFL, I have always been such a borderline football viewer that a combination of a terrible Bears team and absolute human garbage getting away with practically everything they do in this sport has left me not giving a tin shit this year.

I give him a pass, too, but that doesn't mean I don't love ChuckD busting his balls

Oh, I'm not criticizing. I'll probably be doing similarly when we have a kid. Just thought it was funny and totally befitting Slak's status as an up-and-coming Vine star.

And there was me thinking you were one of those "our dog is our kid" kind of guys.

My dog is my kid (dog-hter?) for now. We'll have an actual kid or two in a few years and then dog will just be my copilot.

[Tonker]

And there was me thinking you were one of those "our dog is our kid" kind of guys.

Also, I had somehow assumed this was more of an American culture thing. Apparently not?

Unless Tonk is observing all this American behavior on FB.

OTOH I have a cousin in London whose wife shares the same level of zeal that many animal-lovers in the States possess so perhaps it is more global than I first thought.

Ding ding ding!  I'm also friends with some fucking fruit loop who constantly posts about his two young cat kids.  He's called them something cutesy like Gene and Rita, or some shit like that.

[PenFoe]

And there was me thinking you were one of those "our dog is our kid" kind of guys.

Also, I had somehow assumed this was more of an American culture thing. Apparently not?

Unless Tonk is observing all this American behavior on FB.

OTOH I have a cousin in London whose wife shares the same level of zeal that many animal-lovers in the States possess so perhaps it is more global than I first thought.

Ding ding ding!  I'm also friends with some fucking fruit loop who constantly posts about his two young cat kids.  He's called them something cutesy like Gene and Rita, or some shit like that.

SBox'd