Kyle Hendricks Low Velocity Assassin Splooge Thread

[CBStew]

So far this year, the Cubs' no. 4 starter has pitched 142 innings of 3.50 FIP baseball.  If you'd have offered me that in March, I'd probably have taken it, and yet, every time he goes to the mound I wish he'd chosen some other career.  Part of Hendricks' problem, though, is that he looks like a scared fourteen-year-old: if he had the good face and a thick beard, we'd all cut him a lot more slack.  That's my theory, anyway.

All of this. I know the numbers say he's been quite good, but I don't believe it and I hate looking at his terrified face.

I think it's the fact that his fastball just rarely hits anything above 91.  I know it shouldn't matter that much but I'm just expecting every batter to just hit him hard.

And it is straight as an arrow.

[SKO]

A 2 run rally because he fucking plunked the opposing pitcher.  Jesus Christ

[Canadouche]

Dear Kyle Hendricks:

[Saul Goodman]

I'm not fooled.

[Quality Start Machine]

I'm not fooled.

Getting a fuckload of runs early against a demoralized Phillies team certainly made his life easier.

[SKO]

Burn this thread to the fucking ground.

[Saul Goodman]

If this kid can give us Randy Well's first two years as a #4 or #5 on a good team (with Arrieta and Lester #1 and 2, natch), I'd take that in a goddamn minute.

More like Randy Welp, AMIRITE?

Anyway, Hendricks' FIP (Look at me I read Grantland) is 3.30 and it's been low throughout his minor league career. I say he can pitch at this level. Until he can't.

Right. Even if he ERA rises over time to meet that FIP I'll take a mid-3 ERA any fifth day. Gimme more Kyle. Gimme more.

There's been no indication at any point in his career to indicate that he can't continue getting motherfuckers out. Even as he makes his second round through the NL, he's shown himself to be a smart enough pitcher to be able to adjust to hitters as they adjust to him.

He'll just be a Quality Start Machine for years.

[SKO]

If this kid can give us Randy Well's first two years as a #4 or #5 on a good team (with Arrieta and Lester #1 and 2, natch), I'd take that in a goddamn minute.

More like Randy Welp, AMIRITE?

Anyway, Hendricks' FIP (Look at me I read Grantland) is 3.30 and it's been low throughout his minor league career. I say he can pitch at this level. Until he can't.

Right. Even if he ERA rises over time to meet that FIP I'll take a mid-3 ERA any fifth day. Gimme more Kyle. Gimme more.

There's been no indication at any point in his career to indicate that he can't continue getting motherfuckers out. Even as he makes his second round through the NL, he's shown himself to be a smart enough pitcher to be able to adjust to hitters as they adjust to him.

He'll just be a Quality Start Machine for years.

In Fork's defense he makes hilariously optimistic forecasts about every prospect to wear a Cubs uniform, so he's bound to be wrong sometimes.

[World's #1 Astros Fan]

What a difference a year makes.  That whole quote box is one hilarious bag 'o' wrong.

[Eli]

What a difference a year makes.  That whole quote box is one hilarious bag 'o' wrong.

Quality Start Machine.

[SKO]

What a difference a year makes.  That whole quote box is one hilarious bag 'o' wrong.

Quality Start Machine.

Peace offering: Sterling had him pegged from day one. Good on you, kid.

[Quality Start Machine]

If this kid can give us Randy Well's first two years as a #4 or #5 on a good team (with Arrieta and Lester #1 and 2, natch), I'd take that in a goddamn minute.

More like Randy Welp, AMIRITE?

Anyway, Hendricks' FIP (Look at me I read Grantland) is 3.30 and it's been low throughout his minor league career. I say he can pitch at this level. Until he can't.

Right. Even if he ERA rises over time to meet that FIP I'll take a mid-3 ERA any fifth day. Gimme more Kyle. Gimme more.

There's been no indication at any point in his career to indicate that he can't continue getting motherfuckers out. Even as he makes his second round through the NL, he's shown himself to be a smart enough pitcher to be able to adjust to hitters as they adjust to him.

He'll just be a Quality Start Machine for years.

In Fork's defense he makes hilariously optimistic forecasts about every prospect to wear a Cubs uniform, so he's bound to be wrong sometimes.

Hey, even I pumped the brakes on the "next Maddux" talk that was floating around.

[Eli]

What a difference a year makes.  That whole quote box is one hilarious bag 'o' wrong.

Quality Start Machine.

Peace offering: Sterling had him pegged from day one. Good on you, kid.

He sure did. And looking back, Fork seems to have been the only one really caught up believing in Hendricks.

Fork also gave us this in the thread:

Alcantara has been able to hit at each level, even if he might not get off to a rip-roaring start - same thing with Baez. There's no reaso ton believe either of these guys shouldn't both figure out big-league pitching.

No reason at all to believe Alcantara can't hit major-league pitching.

[SKO]

What a difference a year makes.  That whole quote box is one hilarious bag 'o' wrong.

Quality Start Machine.

Peace offering: Sterling had him pegged from day one. Good on you, kid.

He sure did. And looking back, Fork seems to have been the only one really caught up believing in Hendricks.

Fork also gave us this in the thread:

Alcantara has been able to hit at each level, even if he might not get off to a rip-roaring start - same thing with Baez. There's no reaso ton believe either of these guys shouldn't both figure out big-league pitching.

No reason at all to believe Alcantara can't hit major-league pitching.

Yeah, everyone else was saying it'd be awesome if Hendricks kept it up, Fork was the only one saying he would most definitely keep it up because minor league stats.

[Eli]

What a difference a year makes.  That whole quote box is one hilarious bag 'o' wrong.

Quality Start Machine.

Peace offering: Sterling had him pegged from day one. Good on you, kid.

He sure did. And looking back, Fork seems to have been the only one really caught up believing in Hendricks.

Fork also gave us this in the thread:

Alcantara has been able to hit at each level, even if he might not get off to a rip-roaring start - same thing with Baez. There's no reaso ton believe either of these guys shouldn't both figure out big-league pitching.

No reason at all to believe Alcantara can't hit major-league pitching.

Yeah, everyone else was saying it'd be awesome if Hendricks kept it up, Fork was the only one saying he would most definitely keep it up because minor league stats.

The lesson here, obviously, is to never believe in anyone or anything.