Cubs Offseason 2014: So, what did your team do this offseason? Isn't that cute.

[Tonker]

I had the same feeling with Scherzer and it turned out to be unfounded, so I'll verbalize it here so that it also does not come to pass:

Every day James Shields doesn't sign I fear he ends up in St. Louis on a bargain contract.

Keeping quiet about Scherzer worked perfectly, so you decide you're going to change tack for Shields?  Nice work, Jinx Boy.  When he signs for the Tards, it's on you.

I told several people I thought Scherzer would sign with the Cardinals. Just not on this messageboard. I have human friends, too, you know.

Your RA isn't your friend

Intrepid Reader: Aaron Heilman

Just try saying that to your RA.

My RA is my wife. Well, she's the boss of the RAs.

So you can sneak beer into your dorm? Awesome.

Not sure who is actually familiar with my non-meme living arrangements, but the wife is the area coordinator for  her alma mater now, so we live in an apartment on the top floor of a student apartment complex (rent free, natch). The other night I heard some scuffling from three floors down, which woke up the (nigh six months pregnant and battling the flu at the time) wife, so in my ANGER I stormed downstairs wearing my pajama pants and an old Derrek Lee shirsey. I find a bunch of kids with open bottles and cans everywhere having a wrestling match in the lobby. They tell me "go to bed old man!"

So naturally I played the "MY WIFE IS THE AC AND YOU ARE ALL IN SOO MUCH TROUBLE"  card and laughed as they scattered while security and the cops showed up to ticket them. Then I went back and had a glass of legal booze, like the adult I am.

This story has no point other than I thought y'all might find it amusing and a worthy addition to my list of memes.

That you are a snitch?

Damn right. And I've slept like a baby every night since.

Actually I didn't snitch. I had every intention to but apparently someone else had already informed security and they had already called the cops. But they sure think I did so now I'm just the cantankerous old asshole everyone hates. And I'm happy with that.

You call that cantankerous? Listen son, until you escalate the situation to the point that the cops are being called on YOU then you're not cantanking hard enough.

Goddamn rookies.

I positive this post.  I, too, am a thoroughly miserable, antisocial old cunt.

[SKO]

So...James Shields anyone?

[Chuck to Chuck]

So...James Shields anyone?

Fine by me.

[InternetApex]

So...James Shields anyone?

Fine by me.

I'll have the lot.

[Eli]

So...James Shields anyone?

I just can't see it happening. If his price tag has dropped enough for the Cubs to be interested, presumably a ton of other teams are interested, too. Someone's going to offer more.

[SKO]

So...James Shields anyone?

I just can't see it happening. If his price tag has dropped enough for the Cubs to be interested, presumably a ton of other teams are interested, too. Someone's going to offer more.

Why are you the way you are? I hate so much about the things you choose to be.

[Eli]

So...James Shields anyone?

I just can't see it happening. If his price tag has dropped enough for the Cubs to be interested, presumably a ton of other teams are interested, too. Someone's going to offer more.

Why are you the way you are? I hate so much about the things you choose to be.

Maybe you could call security on me.

[World's #1 Astros Fan]

So...James Shields anyone?

I just can't see it happening. If his price tag has dropped enough for the Cubs to be interested, presumably a ton of other teams are interested, too. Someone's going to offer more.

Why are you the way you are? I hate so much about the things you choose to be.

Maybe you could call security on me.

YA BURNT

[SKO]

So...James Shields anyone?

I just can't see it happening. If his price tag has dropped enough for the Cubs to be interested, presumably a ton of other teams are interested, too. Someone's going to offer more.

Why are you the way you are? I hate so much about the things you choose to be.

Maybe you could call security on me.

Well this would be your first warning. I'll have to just tell on you to my wife and she'll tell you to settle down. Then you'll rue the day you crossed me.

[Chuck to Chuck]

So...James Shields anyone?

I just can't see it happening. If his price tag has dropped enough for the Cubs to be interested, presumably a ton of other teams are interested, too. Someone's going to offer more.

You can't see a team with plenty of cash, low payroll (even with another $20mm per year guy), no more than 18 months away from clearing another $13mm in annual payroll (Jackson), and with a manager who brought the guy up signing Shields?

Maybe it's not 100%, but it's not a 0% change either.

[SKO]

So...James Shields anyone?

I just can't see it happening. If his price tag has dropped enough for the Cubs to be interested, presumably a ton of other teams are interested, too. Someone's going to offer more.

You can't see a team with plenty of cash, low payroll (even with another $20mm per year guy), no more than 18 months away from clearing another $13mm in annual payroll (Jackson), and with a manager who brought the guy up signing Shields?

Maybe it's not 100%, but it's not a 0% change either.

Well and the rumor for quite some time has been that the Red Sox and Dodgers aren't in, St Louis rarely goes after a big free agent pitcher and it sounds like they're out right now, the Yankees are supposedly adamant about not signing a big ticket FA this offseason...so if the Cubs are one of the four or so teams with offers in I doubt they can't outbid the ones they're dealing with.

[Eli]

You can't see a team with plenty of cash, low payroll (even with another $20mm per year guy), no more than 18 months away from clearing another $13mm in annual payroll (Jackson), and with a manager who brought the guy up signing Shields?

I still don't think they have "plenty" of cash that they're willing to spend on payroll.

[BH]

You can't see a team with plenty of cash, low payroll (even with another $20mm per year guy), no more than 18 months away from clearing another $13mm in annual payroll (Jackson), and with a manager who brought the guy up signing Shields?

I still don't think they have "plenty" of cash that they're willing to spend on payroll.

So you don't believe the reports that if Moncada was available after July the Cubs would make a push to sign him? He's going to cost a fortune, and now the Cubs are out on him.

[Eli]

You can't see a team with plenty of cash, low payroll (even with another $20mm per year guy), no more than 18 months away from clearing another $13mm in annual payroll (Jackson), and with a manager who brought the guy up signing Shields?

I still don't think they have "plenty" of cash that they're willing to spend on payroll.

So you don't believe the reports that if Moncada was available after July the Cubs would make a push to sign him? He's going to cost a fortune, and now the Cubs are out on him.

What's your point?

[PenFoe]

You can't see a team with plenty of cash, low payroll (even with another $20mm per year guy), no more than 18 months away from clearing another $13mm in annual payroll (Jackson), and with a manager who brought the guy up signing Shields?

I still don't think they have "plenty" of cash that they're willing to spend on payroll.

So you don't believe the reports that if Moncada was available after July the Cubs would make a push to sign him? He's going to cost a fortune, and now the Cubs are out on him.

What's your point?

That the Cubs have money for payroll.

Seemed pretty clear.