The 2015 Blackhawks playoffs thread

[PenFoe]

As is well documented, I don't give any shits about hockey, but I have no idea how you guys do this all the time.

Seems like every single Blackhawks playoff game goes at least 1 overtime and the entire time is completely anxiety-filled, non-stop action.  

I can only assume you use each period/overtime break to chase down 5 joints with a bottle of Valium.

You people are insane.  

That's about right. Why would anyone want to watch a sport that's non-stop action?

I think I'm finally sobering up from last night. Damn that was intense.

The non-stop action part is entirely unrelated to the not caring part.

Professional table tennis is pretty non-stop - I also don't care for that, though for entirely different reasons that hockey.   

And when the Cubs get as close as the Hawks do on an annual basis, you won't bust out the joints/Valium?

Well, I don't partake in drug use, so I wouldn't. 
Druggie. 

But really, hockey is insane, it's not at all like the level of action in baseball. 

[Quality Start Machine]

As is well documented, I don't give any shits about hockey, but I have no idea how you guys do this all the time.

Seems like every single Blackhawks playoff game goes at least 1 overtime and the entire time is completely anxiety-filled, non-stop action.  

I can only assume you use each period/overtime break to chase down 5 joints with a bottle of Valium.

You people are insane.  

That's about right. Why would anyone want to watch a sport that's non-stop action?

I think I'm finally sobering up from last night. Damn that was intense.

The non-stop action part is entirely unrelated to the not caring part.

Professional table tennis is pretty non-stop - I also don't care for that, though for entirely different reasons that hockey.   

And when the Cubs get as close as the Hawks do on an annual basis, you won't bust out the joints/Valium?

Well, I don't partake in drug use, so I wouldn't. 
Druggie. 

But really, hockey is insane, it's not at all like the level of action in baseball FUCKIN RULES. 

What you meant.

[Bonk]

How about some splooging for these not gutless non-assholes?

Twenty minutes away from the SCF and my operation to save my liver.

[Saul Goodman]

How about some splooging for these not gutless non-assholes?

Twenty minutes away from the SCF and my operation to save my liver.

Um, have you been watching this series?  Don't you think your splooging might be a little premature?  (Heh.)

Edit: Cleared to splooge.  HAWKS HAWKS HAWKS HAWKS

[Bonk]

How about some splooging for these not gutless non-assholes?

Twenty minutes away from the SCF and my operation to save my liver.

Um, have you been watching this series?  Don't you think your splooging might be a little premature?  (Heh.)

Edit: Cleared to splooge.  HAWKS HAWKS HAWKS HAWKS

Yeah, but I felt like after the way they played for the first 40 they weren't '03 LCS-ing that game away.

Plus I predicted that I would be really drunk by the end of Game 6, and I was right about that.

[CT III]

That was a goddamn clinic.  If the Hawks have 4 more of those in them, it's Cup time.

[flannj]

One of my kids pointed out last night that Bruce Boudreau and Sir Topham Hatt were seperated at birth...

[ChuckD]

One of my kids pointed out last night that Bruce Boudreau and Sir Topham Hatt were seperated at birth...

I saw some flashes of Don Zimmer. Could have been all the Warped Speed I'd been a drinking, though.

[Quality Start Machine]

Not resizing, because it's the best thing ever.

[Slaky]

How about some splooging for these not gutless non-assholes?

Twenty minutes away from the SCF and my operation to save my liver.

Um, have you been watching this series?  Don't you think your splooging might be a little premature?  (Heh.)

Edit: Cleared to splooge.  HAWKS HAWKS HAWKS HAWKS

check out this guy who doesn't get it

[World's #1 Astros Fan]

How about some splooging for these not gutless non-assholes?

Twenty minutes away from the SCF and my operation to save my liver.

Um, have you been watching this series?  Don't you think your splooging might be a little premature?  (Heh.)

Edit: Cleared to splooge.  HAWKS HAWKS HAWKS HAWKS

check out this guy who doesn't get it

Yeah the Hawks are jinx-proof.  They're so good that our shared fear of shit going to hell at the 11th hour doesn't even exist. 

A day after the nut-punching OT loss in Game 5, I told my dad that I actually kind of felt bad for the Ducks, that they were so excited and that it was as close as they were going to get to winning the series.  Such hubris would've gotten me sent to my room as a kid as feeling sorry for your opponent before the game or series was over violated one of the Cardinal Rules concerning jinxing.  Indeed, in late 1983, the Bears suffered a tough late-season loss to the Packers, but not before they actually had the game in hand and the cameras panned to Green Bay coach Bart Starr, whom was likely fired at the season's end.  My mom--remembering Starr as the NFL standard-bearer QB that put that bullshit AFL in its place--vocally expressed sympathy for Starr, at which point my dad got very upset.  Sure enough the Packers rallied back and won the game and my parents nearly got divorced over it.

But not this team.  They don't have any of the baggage that all of the other non-Bulls teams that we've rooted for seemed to have.  Things may have seemed a little tense in the second period but once the Hawks scored the 3rd goal in the 1st  that game was in the bag and I wasn't afraid to think as much at the time.

[SKO]

How about some splooging for these not gutless non-assholes?

Twenty minutes away from the SCF and my operation to save my liver.

Um, have you been watching this series?  Don't you think your splooging might be a little premature?  (Heh.)

Edit: Cleared to splooge.  HAWKS HAWKS HAWKS HAWKS

check out this guy who doesn't get it

Yeah the Hawks are jinx-proof.  They're so good that our shared fear of shit going to hell at the 11th hour doesn't even exist. 

A day after the nut-punching OT loss in Game 5, I told my dad that I actually kind of felt bad for the Ducks, that they were so excited and that it was as close as they were going to get to winning the series.  Such hubris would've gotten me sent to my room as a kid as feeling sorry for your opponent before the game or series was over violated one of the Cardinal Rules concerning jinxing.  Indeed, in late 1983, the Bears suffered a tough late-season loss to the Packers, but not before they actually had the game in hand and the cameras panned to Green Bay coach Bart Starr, whom was likely fired at the season's end.  My mom--remembering Starr as the NFL standard-bearer QB that put that bullshit AFL in its place--vocally expressed sympathy for Starr, at which point my dad got very upset.  Sure enough the Packers rallied back and won the game and my parents nearly got divorced over it.
But not this team.  They don't have any of the baggage that all of the other non-Bulls teams that we've rooted for seemed to have.  Things may have seemed a little tense in the second period but once the Hawks scored the 3rd goal in the 1st  that game was in the bag and I wasn't afraid to think as much at the time.

Everything about you now makes sense.

[World's #1 Astros Fan]

How about some splooging for these not gutless non-assholes?

Twenty minutes away from the SCF and my operation to save my liver.

Um, have you been watching this series?  Don't you think your splooging might be a little premature?  (Heh.)

Edit: Cleared to splooge.  HAWKS HAWKS HAWKS HAWKS

check out this guy who doesn't get it

Yeah the Hawks are jinx-proof.  They're so good that our shared fear of shit going to hell at the 11th hour doesn't even exist. 

A day after the nut-punching OT loss in Game 5, I told my dad that I actually kind of felt bad for the Ducks, that they were so excited and that it was as close as they were going to get to winning the series.  Such hubris would've gotten me sent to my room as a kid as feeling sorry for your opponent before the game or series was over violated one of the Cardinal Rules concerning jinxing.  Indeed, in late 1983, the Bears suffered a tough late-season loss to the Packers, but not before they actually had the game in hand and the cameras panned to Green Bay coach Bart Starr, whom was likely fired at the season's end.  My mom--remembering Starr as the NFL standard-bearer QB that put that bullshit AFL in its place--vocally expressed sympathy for Starr, at which point my dad got very upset.  Sure enough the Packers rallied back and won the game and my parents nearly got divorced over it.
But not this team.  They don't have any of the baggage that all of the other non-Bulls teams that we've rooted for seemed to have.  Things may have seemed a little tense in the second period but once the Hawks scored the 3rd goal in the 1st  that game was in the bag and I wasn't afraid to think as much at the time.

Everything about you now makes sense.

*nods head*

[R-V]

How about some splooging for these not gutless non-assholes?

Twenty minutes away from the SCF and my operation to save my liver.

Um, have you been watching this series?  Don't you think your splooging might be a little premature?  (Heh.)

Edit: Cleared to splooge.  HAWKS HAWKS HAWKS HAWKS

check out this guy who doesn't get it

Yeah the Hawks are jinx-proof.  They're so good that our shared fear of shit going to hell at the 11th hour doesn't even exist. 

A day after the nut-punching OT loss in Game 5, I told my dad that I actually kind of felt bad for the Ducks, that they were so excited and that it was as close as they were going to get to winning the series.  Such hubris would've gotten me sent to my room as a kid as feeling sorry for your opponent before the game or series was over violated one of the Cardinal Rules concerning jinxing.  Indeed, in late 1983, the Bears suffered a tough late-season loss to the Packers, but not before they actually had the game in hand and the cameras panned to Green Bay coach Bart Starr, whom was likely fired at the season's end.  My mom--remembering Starr as the NFL standard-bearer QB that put that bullshit AFL in its place--vocally expressed sympathy for Starr, at which point my dad got very upset.  Sure enough the Packers rallied back and won the game and my parents nearly got divorced over it.

But not this team.  They don't have any of the baggage that all of the other non-Bulls teams that we've rooted for seemed to have.  Things may have seemed a little tense in the second period but once the Hawks scored the 3rd goal in the 1st  that game was in the bag and I wasn't afraid to think as much at the time.

Yet another reason why I would watch the ever-loving shit out of a Huey biopic. I guess we need to wait to get started on production until after you have a grabber in the stands at Wrigley after someone stands up a few seconds too soon for your taste.

[World's #1 Astros Fan]

How about some splooging for these not gutless non-assholes?

Twenty minutes away from the SCF and my operation to save my liver.

Um, have you been watching this series?  Don't you think your splooging might be a little premature?  (Heh.)

Edit: Cleared to splooge.  HAWKS HAWKS HAWKS HAWKS

check out this guy who doesn't get it

Yeah the Hawks are jinx-proof.  They're so good that our shared fear of shit going to hell at the 11th hour doesn't even exist.  

A day after the nut-punching OT loss in Game 5, I told my dad that I actually kind of felt bad for the Ducks, that they were so excited and that it was as close as they were going to get to winning the series.  Such hubris would've gotten me sent to my room as a kid as feeling sorry for your opponent before the game or series was over violated one of the Cardinal Rules concerning jinxing.  Indeed, in late 1983, the Bears suffered a tough late-season loss to the Packers, but not before they actually had the game in hand and the cameras panned to Green Bay coach Bart Starr, whom was likely fired at the season's end.  My mom--remembering Starr as the NFL standard-bearer QB that put that bullshit AFL in its place--vocally expressed sympathy for Starr, at which point my dad got very upset.  Sure enough the Packers rallied back and won the game and my parents nearly got divorced over it.

But not this team.  They don't have any of the baggage that all of the other non-Bulls teams that we've rooted for seemed to have.  Things may have seemed a little tense in the second period but once the Hawks scored the 3rd goal in the 1st  that game was in the bag and I wasn't afraid to think as much at the time.

Yet another reason why I would watch the ever-loving shit out of a Huey biopic. I guess we need to wait to get started on production until after you have a grabber in the stands at Wrigley after someone stands up a few seconds too soon for your taste.

As a point of fact I literally was once sent to my room after walking into my dad's room while he was sitting on the edge of his bed listening on the radio  to the end of a Sox game in which they were losing (he listened to the games because he'd have been damned if he would pay any money to Reinsdorf and Einhorn for their bullshit SportsVision, even if it meant we could see Blackhawks and more Bulls game).

I asked him the score and he told me the Sox were losing with two out in the 9th and I flippantly said "Oh this game's over".  As soon as I said that my dad shot me a glare as we listened to (Don Drysdale's?) call of Jerry Hairston hitting a lead-changing walk off home run.

Yeah I got stories.