Firebarn Chris Coghlan Because Fuck You, That's Why

[SKO]

I wonder how quickly Milwaukee will throw in the towel on this year and what it would cost for an Adam Lind rental. That's a lefty platoon bat that could make a lot of sense.

EDITED: woops, see he hasn't started a game in the OF since 2010. I thought he played OF more often than that.

[Tonker]

Seriously, though.  Enough about Coghlan.

[CubFaninHydePark]

Whoa whoa whoa. I'm at least co-leader of the Coghlan Sucks Firebarn, but Junior Lake is almost certainly going to be worse.

Lake will be better defensively, at least marginally, and it's hard to see him hitting worse (unless he's still as useless against sliders out of the zone).

If Olt can come back healthy, Bryant to left with Olt getting Coughlins ABs seems like the best outcome that doesn't involve calling someone else up or making a trade.

[Yeti]

Chris would kindly ask SKO to get bent

[Saul Goodman]

Chris would kindly ask SKO to get bent

Twice.

[Tonker]

Chris would kindly ask SKO to get bent

Twice.

Roughly from behind, with no kissing.

[SKO]

I am thoroughly bent.

[Eli]

I am thoroughly bent.

OPS is all the way up to .705 after last night's outburst. Take that, SKO.

[SKO]

I am thoroughly bent.

OPS is all the way up to .705 after last night's outburst. Take that, SKO.

Let 'em have their day, Eli. Let 'em have their day.

[Slaky]

I am thoroughly bent.

OPS is all the way up to .705 after last night's outburst. Take that, SKO.

Let 'em have their day, Eli. Let 'em have their day.

I also hate it when guys on the Cubs do well.

[SKO]

I am thoroughly bent.

OPS is all the way up to .705 after last night's outburst. Take that, SKO.

Let 'em have their day, Eli. Let 'em have their day.

I also hate it when guys on the Cubs do well.

Oh come on I'm trying here. I was happy for him. I told Eli to lay off. WHAT MORE DO YOU PEOPLE WANT FROM ME.

[SKO]

I hope Chris Coghlan gets fucking hotter than shit, just to shove it in my fucking face. Okay?

[Eli]

I am thoroughly bent.

OPS is all the way up to .705 after last night's outburst. Take that, SKO.

Let 'em have their day, Eli. Let 'em have their day.

I also hate it when guys on the Cubs do well.

Oh come on I'm trying here. I was happy for him. I told Eli to lay off. WHAT MORE DO YOU PEOPLE WANT FROM ME.

I believe you. I was wrong about Montero and I'm loving every oppo dong and every sprint-to-first-on-a-walk and every malformed tweet.

[Quality Start Machine]

I am thoroughly bent.

OPS is all the way up to .705 after last night's outburst. Take that, SKO.

Let 'em have their day, Eli. Let 'em have their day.

I also hate it when guys on the Cubs do well.

Oh come on I'm trying here. I was happy for him. I told Eli to lay off. WHAT MORE DO YOU PEOPLE WANT FROM ME.

You at every Cub game with a "Coghlan Meter" would be a nice start.

[Powdered Toast Man]

Whoa whoa whoa. I'm at least co-leader of the Coghlan Sucks Firebarn, but Junior Lake is almost certainly going to be worse.

Lake will be better defensively, at least marginally, and it's hard to see him hitting worse (unless he's still as useless against sliders out of the zone).

If Olt can come back healthy, Bryant to left with Olt getting Coughlins ABs seems like the best outcome that doesn't involve calling someone else up or making a trade.

I don't even think Olt is out of a cast yet.

Also, FYSKO.