Jon Lester Jacking It Lefty Splooge Thread

[Slaky]

Big start for Lester today. If he falters, and he might, because SPORTZ, I fully expect a diatribe from you know who in this thread today. And that, quite honestly, will piss me off more than an actual non-quality start and a loss.

There's a lot riding on this one. Come on, Jon.

Somehow a Lester loss will override all the actual World Series success he's had. Or maybe the Cubs uniform sapped him of his Cardinal taming abilities. Or maybe he's old now. Or maybe the Cubs wasted a lot of money.

Either way, Lester is pitching against every hot take asshole in the city and the nation.

Let's go Jon. I believe in you.

[SKO]

I'm just glad they don't NEED a win, as Lester has proven largely disappointing as a stopper.

That said, he's done well most of the year but I don't know that we've seen a "nails" performance (i.e. 8 IP 1 or fewer runs) in several weeks now.

Today would be a great fucking day for that.

Well, sure, you're technically correct. It was like 2 1/2 weeks ago that he went 8 2/3, 1 ER vs the Indians. He followed that up with 6 shutout innings on the road vs the Dodgers before BABIP, bad defense, and Montero throwing the ball into left field when he had Utley picked off easily at third did him in.

I guess he only went 5 IP, 2 ER vs AZ last time out but I think that Joe decided "nails" was unnecessary with a 14 run lead.

Either way, I think you're being a little hard on the man.

[World's #1 Astros Fan]

I'm just glad they don't NEED a win, as Lester has proven largely disappointing as a stopper.

That said, he's done well most of the year but I don't know that we've seen a "nails" performance (i.e. 8 IP 1 or fewer runs) in several weeks now.

Today would be a great fucking day for that.

Well, sure, you're technically correct. It was like 2 1/2 weeks ago that he went 8 2/3, 1 ER vs the Indians. He followed that up with 6 shutout innings on the road vs the Dodgers before BABIP, bad defense, and Montero throwing the ball into left field when he had Utley picked off easily at third did him in.

I guess he only went 5 IP, 2 ER vs AZ last time out but I think that Joe decided "nails" was unnecessary with a 14 run lead.

Either way, I think you're being a little hard on the man.

And you're being a Grade-A bullshit tolerator with the BABIP nonsense and teammates relegating him to an existence of DOOM with a bad play here and there.  If memory serves, he left two pitches out over the plate which were cleanly lined the opposite way into right field--one to perennial slapdick AJ Ellis and the other to some cumstain punch n judy who drove in his first career RBI with his hit.  These were not "woe is me, perchance that nefarious rawhide bounced 180 times between my two infielders", these were "let's leave a fat pitch off the outside corner that these useless-hitters can tee off and punch the other way at will".  Yes, Montero did him no favors with his errant throw but I think Lester would be the first to admit that he should have and could have picked his catcher up.  But he didn't.  It wasn't a shitty performance but it was far from great and it was definitely disappointing, coming as it did on the heels of a 3-game losing streak.  I don't think I'm being hard on him at all.  All I said was he hasn't been "nails" in several weeks which is pretty close to correct.

[SKO]

I'm just glad they don't NEED a win, as Lester has proven largely disappointing as a stopper.

That said, he's done well most of the year but I don't know that we've seen a "nails" performance (i.e. 8 IP 1 or fewer runs) in several weeks now.

Today would be a great fucking day for that.

Well, sure, you're technically correct. It was like 2 1/2 weeks ago that he went 8 2/3, 1 ER vs the Indians. He followed that up with 6 shutout innings on the road vs the Dodgers before BABIP, bad defense, and Montero throwing the ball into left field when he had Utley picked off easily at third did him in.

I guess he only went 5 IP, 2 ER vs AZ last time out but I think that Joe decided "nails" was unnecessary with a 14 run lead.

Either way, I think you're being a little hard on the man.

And you're being a Grade-A bullshit tolerator with the BABIP nonsense and teammates relegating him to an existence of DOOM with a bad play here and there.  If memory serves, he left two pitches out over the plate which were cleanly lined the opposite way into right field--one to perennial slapdick AJ Ellis and the other to some cumstain punch n judy who drove in his first career RBI with his hit.  These were not "woe is me, perchance that nefarious rawhide bounced 180 times between my two infielders", these were "let's leave a fat pitch off the outside corner that these useless-hitters can tee off and punch the other way at will".  Yes, Montero did him no favors with his errant throw but I think Lester would be the first to admit that he should have and could have picked his catcher up.  But he didn't.  It wasn't a shitty performance but it was far from great and it was definitely disappointing, coming as it did on the heels of a 3-game losing streak.  I don't think I'm being hard on him at all.  All I said was he hasn't been "nails" in several weeks which is pretty close to correct.

So, again, two mediocre starts (and one which probably is a quality start if Joe hadn't wisely decided to save Jon's bullets with a double digit lead) since his last nigh complete game shutout. I just feel like saying "he hasn't been nails in WEEKS" really exaggerates things, given that as a starter with off days mixed in he pitches once a week to begin with.

[SKO]

What I'm saying is at least he's not that worthless slapdick Jason Hammel.

You wanna talk bullshit toleration, how about RV's whole "golly gee it's just bad luck that all of his bad starts have been happening in a row for almost three months now, but let's not be too hard on him since his season numbers are still respectable looking because he had an abnormally hot May" crap?

[Quality Start Machine]

I think instead of trying to soothe Huard's chapped ass, let's just bask in the fact that Jon Lester is one helluva #2 starter.

[Eli]

I don't think I'm being hard on him at all. 

You are.

[World's #1 Astros Fan]

I don't think I'm being hard on him at all. 

You are.

I'm just glad they don't NEED a win, as Lester has proven largely disappointing as a stopper.

That said, he's done well most of the year but I don't know that we've seen a "nails" performance (i.e. 8 IP 1 or fewer runs) in several weeks now.

Today would be a great fucking day for that.

I'll admit I forgot about the Cleveland game but I don't see where I'm exactly being HARD on the guy.  Just saying it'd be a good time for him be the balls today.  If not, tomorrow's another day. It's not lucking I'm going all CFIHP on the guy.

[SKO]

I don't think I'm being hard on him at all. 

You are.

I'm just glad they don't NEED a win, as Lester has proven largely disappointing as a stopper.

That said, he's done well most of the year but I don't know that we've seen a "nails" performance (i.e. 8 IP 1 or fewer runs) in several weeks now.

Today would be a great fucking day for that.

I'll admit I forgot about the Cleveland game but I don't see where I'm exactly being HARD on the guy.  Just saying it'd be a good time for him be the balls today.  If not, tomorrow's another day. It's not lucking I'm going all CFIHP on the guy.

What is it lucking then

[World's #1 Astros Fan]

I don't think I'm being hard on him at all. 

You are.

I'm just glad they don't NEED a win, as Lester has proven largely disappointing as a stopper.

That said, he's done well most of the year but I don't know that we've seen a "nails" performance (i.e. 8 IP 1 or fewer runs) in several weeks now.

Today would be a great fucking day for that.

I'll admit I forgot about the Cleveland game but I don't see where I'm exactly being HARD on the guy.  Just saying it'd be a good time for him be the balls today.  If not, tomorrow's another day. It's not lucking I'm going all CFIHP on the guy.

What is it lucking then

Exactly.

[R-V]

What I'm saying is at least he's not that worthless slapdick Jason Hammel.

You wanna talk bullshit toleration, how about RV's whole "golly gee it's just bad luck that all of his bad starts have been happening in a row for almost three months now, but let's not be too hard on him since his season numbers are still respectable looking because he had an abnormally hot May" crap?

I not only tolerate bullshit, I welcome it. I'd eat it all day if I could. Give me a big old plate of bullshit and a soup spoon and I'll go to bed happy.

[SKO]

I don't care if he fell an inning shy of the Huebiter Standard of Nailsitude or whatever, that was a hell of a game from Lester.

Also, fuck you, CFIHP

[ChuckD]

I'm just glad they don't NEED a win, as Lester has proven largely disappointing as a stopper.

That said, he's done well most of the year but I don't know that we've seen a "nails" performance (i.e. 8 IP 1 or fewer runs) in several weeks now.

Today would be a great fucking day for that.

ARE YOU FUCKING SORRY?

[Quality Start Machine]

This is a formal invitation for Spudsy O'Helmethead to get stuffed.

[Eli]

I'm just glad they don't NEED a win, as Lester has proven largely disappointing as a stopper.

That said, he's done well most of the year but I don't know that we've seen a "nails" performance (i.e. 8 IP 1 or fewer runs) in several weeks now.

Today would be a great fucking day for that.

ARE YOU FUCKING SORRY?

Huey clearly laid out his standards and Lester failed to meet them. Case closed.