The "Jason Heyward Drinks Delicious Cardinal Tears" Sploogetime Thread

[Wheezer]

You just want to not hate *this* overpaid player

Wait, they're getting paid this season? That can't be right.

[WTB...A RING FFS!!]

I may be jumping the gun a bit, but it doesn't really look like the 4 days riding the pine is paying off just yet.

[WTB...A RING FFS!!]

I guess I need to badmouth him more.

[Oleg]

I guess I need to badmouth him more.

Or, be less knee-jerk reactionary?  I'm just thinking out loud here.

[ChuckD]

I guess I need to badmouth him more.

Or, be less knee-jerk reactionary?  I'm just thinking out loud here.

Or get him more AB's against EJax. Just spitballin' here.

[flannj]

I guess I need to badmouth him more.

Or, be less knee-jerk reactionary?  I'm just thinking out loud here.

Or get him more AB's against EJax. Just spitballin' here.

Ya know that ball just barely cleared the wall.
I need to see a more prodigious HR in order for me to jump the gun less.

[ChuckD]

I guess I need to badmouth him more.

Or, be less knee-jerk reactionary?  I'm just thinking out loud here.

Or get him more AB's against EJax. Just spitballin' here.

Ya know that ball just barely cleared the wall.
I need to see a more prodigious HR in order for me to jump the gun less.

That's tough. He's only got 6 HR and 5 of them are classified as "Just Enough" by ESPN.

http://www.hittrackeronline.com/detail.php?id=2016_1888&type=hitter

So maybe look at the one on on June 11, I guess.

[WTB...A RING FFS!!]

He's been so bad at the plate that my bullshit toleration hopes for him at this pt would be 240/340/375/715...I can't believe I'm typing that about our 184 million dollar RF.

[Saul Goodman]

He's been so bad at the plate that my bullshit toleration hopes for him at this pt would be 240/340/375/715...I can't believe I'm typing that about our 184 million dollar RF.

Have you sent these to the Cubs to have posted in his locker?

[ChuckD]

He's been so bad at the plate that my bullshit toleration hopes for him at this pt would be 240/340/375/715...I can't believe I'm typing that about our 184 million dollar RF.

That'd make him about a 4 win player, so that'd be pretty ok.

[Saul Goodman]

I'd like to commend Cardinals fans for focusing on what's really important: Jason Heyward's performance on offense, not their being 12.5 games behind the team he plays for.

[Bort]

I'd like to commend Cardinals fans for focusing on what's really important: Jason Heyward's performance on offense, not their being 12.5 games behind the team he plays for.

They only have so many straws to clutch.

[WTB...A RING FFS!!]

Tards fans=Slackers fans:Spoiled, obnoxious and vindictive.

[thehawk]

I'd like to commend Cardinals fans for focusing on what's really important: Jason Heyward's performance on offense, not their being 12.5 games behind the team he plays for.

They only have so many straws to clutch.

Or pearls. And now its 13.5 games

[Saul Goodman]

Great at-bat. Followed by a really dumb steal attempt. Someone should have told him that Bryant's on deck.