The 2016 Cubs: SPLOOGE SPLOOGE SPLOOGE

[Oleg]

I am enjoying all this debate about a guy who's got about 4 weeks left in the Cubs system.

Say, anybody know how Almora's WAR stacks up against Andrew Miller's?

Seems to me that the three pillars of this here newly-minted 2017 Cubs Splooge Thread oughta be (the aforementioned Willson, the Return of the Schwar Machine, and perhaps more than anything else...) Every Day Javy.

But then, I suppose Every Day Javy might be an actual thing even before Almora not being a Cub anymore becomes a thing.

The Yankees have no interest in Almora. They've got a fortune sunk into their outfield.

Scout Fork is now GM Fork. Because yeah the response to having bad expensive old outfielders certainly wouldn't be "replace them with cheap young outfielders" and the Yankees aren't a franchise with the money to pay guys to not play for them. No way.

If they're shopping in the Cubs farm system, do you seriously think Almora is anywhere on their list? If he is, he's after Contreras, Underwood, Blackburn and Torres at the very least.

I think if Almora is better than whatever they have in the pipeline in CF then yes, they're probably looking at him. That is how this works

If we're going by what the Yankees have in their pipeline, then shit, send them Murton.

I have no idea what you're talking about anymore.

Oh, nothing but two seemingly diametrically-opposed notions in sucessive posts, my god it's nearly taken my breath away, beginning with some Matt Harvey-sized Forkperbole: A) Yankees have no need Almora, he's down their list etc. and then B) The Yankees minor league outfield depth is so thin that Matt Murton would be an improvement, they'd happily take him.

I need to sit down.

I ... think Fork is saying that Almora is a gem the Cubs don't need to part with to get what they want from the Yankees.

maybe that was what his second statement indicated, but that completely contradicts his first post, which basically said the Yankees would refuse to negotiate unless the Cubs gave up one of their prospects that's better than Almora.

I also don't think Almora is the guy who is going to make Yankee front office people's nether regions tingly. A glove guy with no power is something they don't usually pursue.

They literally just traded for one 5 months ago.
They literally still have a 32-year old one on their roster.
Both of these have been pointed out before.

Are you doing a bit?

[SKO]

Papelbon was the best reliever traded at last year's deadline (and he's not as good or as young as Miller so Miller would undoubtedly get a bigger return) and the Nats got him for their organizational equivalent of Pen's beloved Ryan Williams.

The Red Sox got a pretty good haul for Miller when they traded him at the deadline in 2014 (when he was a FA after the season).

When did one guy become a haul? They traded him for Eduardo Rodriguez, at the time ranked no higher than #61 on anyone's list and struggling to a 4.79 ERA and 1.440 WHIP in AA. He took off after the Red Sox got him because Baltimore obviously has no idea what to do with any starting pitching prospect but I'd say that was a fairly modest return for one of the game's top relievers back when he was making less than 2 million a year and not 9 million.

The only thing I could see keeping the Cubs from topping anyone's offer for Miller by including a guy like Almora is if the Yankees insist on a starting pitching prospect. The Cubs don't have many good ones who are near major league ready and the few promising ones they have in the lower minors are guys they might want to hang onto, like Cease. 

[PenFoe]

If you ever wanted to interrogate information out of me, just force me to read the last few pages of this thread over and over and I'll give up everything important in this world.

[PenFoe]

What the hell is Federowicz still doing on this team?  Did everyone forget he's on the roster?  He has 5 ABs in the last 21 days.

Edwards, Contreras, Vogelbach, Kawasaki, Alcantra, Kalish, Felix Pena, Spencer Patton - all of those dudes make more sense than having this guy on the roster. 

[SKO]

What the hell is Federowicz still doing on this team?  Did everyone forget he's on the roster?  He has 5 ABs in the last 21 days.

Edwards, Contreras, Vogelbach, Kawasaki, Alcantra, Kalish, Felix Pena, Spencer Patton - all of those dudes make more sense than having this guy on the roster. 

They need someone to pinch hit for Jason Heyward #FullMeatball

[Quality Start Machine]

What the hell is Federowicz still doing on this team?  Did everyone forget he's on the roster?  He has 5 ABs in the last 21 days.

Edwards, Contreras, Vogelbach, Kawasaki, Alcantra, Kalish, Felix Pena, Spencer Patton - all of those dudes make more sense than having this guy on the roster. 

SKO, Toyota Jan, Ronnie Woo-Woo

[Oleg]

What the hell is Federowicz still doing on this team?  Did everyone forget he's on the roster?  He has 5 ABs in the last 21 days.

Edwards, Contreras, Vogelbach, Kawasaki, Alcantra, Kalish, Felix Pena, Spencer Patton - all of those dudes make more sense than having this guy on the roster. 

SKO, Toyota Jan, Ronnie Woo-Woo

What is people who wear an onion on their belt?

[Oleg]

What the hell is Federowicz still doing on this team?  Did everyone forget he's on the roster?  He has 5 ABs in the last 21 days.

Edwards, Contreras, Vogelbach, Kawasaki, Alcantra, Kalish, Felix Pena, Spencer Patton - all of those dudes make more sense than having this guy on the roster. 

#NeverForget

[Bort]

What the hell is Federowicz still doing on this team?  Did everyone forget he's on the roster?  He has 5 ABs in the last 21 days.

Edwards, Contreras, Vogelbach, Kawasaki, Alcantra, Kalish, Felix Pena, Spencer Patton - all of those dudes make more sense than having this guy on the roster. 

SKO, Toyota Jan, Ronnie Woo-Woo

What is people who wear an onion on their belt?

SKO in a belt? It's like you've never even read the meme spreadsheet.

[Quality Start Machine]

What the hell is Federowicz still doing on this team?  Did everyone forget he's on the roster?  He has 5 ABs in the last 21 days.

Edwards, Contreras, Vogelbach, Kawasaki, Alcantra, Kalish, Felix Pena, Spencer Patton - all of those dudes make more sense than having this guy on the roster. 

SKO, Toyota Jan, Ronnie Woo-Woo

What is people who wear an onion on their belt?

when did SKO get a belt?

[SKO]

What the hell is Federowicz still doing on this team?  Did everyone forget he's on the roster?  He has 5 ABs in the last 21 days.

Edwards, Contreras, Vogelbach, Kawasaki, Alcantra, Kalish, Felix Pena, Spencer Patton - all of those dudes make more sense than having this guy on the roster. 

SKO, Toyota Jan, Ronnie Woo-Woo

What is people who wear an onion on their belt?

SKO in a belt? It's like you've never even read the meme spreadsheet.

Oh I've got a belt

[Oleg]

What the hell is Federowicz still doing on this team?  Did everyone forget he's on the roster?  He has 5 ABs in the last 21 days.

Edwards, Contreras, Vogelbach, Kawasaki, Alcantra, Kalish, Felix Pena, Spencer Patton - all of those dudes make more sense than having this guy on the roster. 

SKO, Toyota Jan, Ronnie Woo-Woo

What is people who wear an onion on their belt?

SKO in a belt? It's like you've never even read the meme spreadsheet.

[Quality Start Machine]

Seriously, a couple crackheads couldn't be any worse on this roster than Richard and Fererowicz.

[Yeti]

Seriously, a couple crackheads couldn't be any worse on this roster than Richard and Fererowicz.

I think the softball team that got no-hit is probably worse than Federowicz

[Canadouche]

What the hell is Federowicz still doing on this team?  Did everyone forget he's on the roster?  He has 5 ABs in the last 21 days.

Edwards, Contreras, Vogelbach, Kawasaki, Alcantra, Kalish, Felix Pena, Spencer Patton - all of those dudes make more sense than having this guy on the roster. 

SKO, Toyota Jan, Ronnie Woo-Woo

What is people who wear an onion on their belt?

SKO in a belt? It's like you've never even read the meme spreadsheet.

Oh I've got a belt

But does it have a watch attached?