John Lackey's Blazing Horse House Inferno

[Tonker]

That was a well pitched ball game but he can still get fucked for being such a red ass over a dude admiring a massive bomb. Also, if you're going to yell at a dude for not hustling around the bases after a bomb, maybe get your lazy ass over and cover first on a grounder.

There are guys who you absolutely loathe when they're on the other team and then you love them when they're on yours. Carlos Zambrano is such person. Lackey isn't like that.

Lackey's more like Michael Barrett.

As is well documented by now, having previously loathed Lackey, I now love him, and I also liked Michael Barrett.  Being a twat, or an ex-Cardinal, or even an ex-Cardinal twat doesn't preclude you from being a good ballplayer, and the more good ballplayers the Cubs have, the happier I am.  What I do have a problem with is twats or ex-Cardinals who are also shitty players: see Theriot, R.; Mabry, J.; Hawkins, L.; Mather, J.  If Lackey wants to chirp at somebody for admiring a home run, what the fuck do I care?  He's good, and he's ON MY SIDE.

[Chuck to Chuck]

That was a well pitched ball game but he can still get fucked for being such a red ass over a dude admiring a massive bomb. Also, if you're going to yell at a dude for not hustling around the bases after a bomb, maybe get your lazy ass over and cover first on a grounder.

There are guys who you absolutely loathe when they're on the other team and then you love them when they're on yours. Carlos Zambrano is such person. Lackey isn't like that.

Lackey's more like Michael Barrett.

Nah. Lackey's a prick who is pretty good.  Barrett is a fucking idiot who was awful awful.

Barrett was worth 7.5 WAR in his three full seasons as a Cub. I get that you are dumb and say things like "Alfonso Soriano was bad", but if we're making comps of "unlikeable assholes who were pretty decent in a Cub uniform" Barrett most definitely fits the bill.

BBR has him at 5.8 for three seasons. Below their benchmark of 2.0 for bottom level starter.

And there's this.

2 WAR is average, not "bottom level starter." Montero last year was worth 1.8 bWAR. Barrett was an above average  starter  for three years and a jackass his entire life.

I'm just going by this.  They define "Starter" as 2 or more.  You guys can go more in depth on his stats if you want. I gave it all the time it deserved.

[Eli]

It's way too early to try and wrap my head around how Chuck argues on the Internet.

[Slaky]

It's way too early to try and wrap my head around how Chuck argues on the Internet.

If the discussion is "Was Michael Barrett awful or was he serviceable" I think it's best if everyone just logs off. He obviously wasn't awful.

[Chuck to Chuck]

It's way too early to try and wrap my head around how Chuck argues on the Internet.

If the discussion is "Was Michael Barrett awful or was he serviceable" I think it's best if everyone just logs off. He obviously wasn't awful.

Zambrano disagreed.  Possibly my favorite thing Z ever did was beat the shit out of Barrett.

[Oleg]

It's way too early to try and wrap my head around how Chuck argues on the Internet.

If the discussion is "Was Michael Barrett awful or was he serviceable" I think it's best if everyone just logs off. He obviously wasn't awful.

Zambrano disagreed.  Possibly my favorite thing Z ever did was beat the shit out of Barrett.

Of course it was.

I can think of at least one game winning hit he had while he was here but, hey, I don't really expect you to actually like The Cubs.

[SKO]

It's way too early to try and wrap my head around how Chuck argues on the Internet.

If the discussion is "Was Michael Barrett awful or was he serviceable" I think it's best if everyone just logs off. He obviously wasn't awful.

Zambrano disagreed.  Possibly my favorite thing Z ever did was beat the shit out of Barrett.

Of course it was.

I can think of at least one game winning hit he had while he was here but, hey, I don't really expect you to actually like The Cubs.

Yeah that time Zambrano threw a no hitter? Fuck that. The time he homered from both sides of the plate in the same game? Who cares. That time he punched a teammate? Oh yeah, that's where it is.

[Oleg]

It's way too early to try and wrap my head around how Chuck argues on the Internet.

If the discussion is "Was Michael Barrett awful or was he serviceable" I think it's best if everyone just logs off. He obviously wasn't awful.

Zambrano disagreed.  Possibly my favorite thing Z ever did was beat the shit out of Barrett.

Of course it was.

I can think of at least one game winning hit he had while he was here but, hey, I don't really expect you to actually like The Cubs.

Yeah that time Zambrano threw a no hitter? Fuck that. The time he homered from both sides of the plate in the same game? Who cares. That time he punched a teammate? Oh yeah, that's where it is.

I was talking about Barrett's game winner against the A's.   But, yeah...Chuck doesn't really like baseball.

[SKO]

It's way too early to try and wrap my head around how Chuck argues on the Internet.

If the discussion is "Was Michael Barrett awful or was he serviceable" I think it's best if everyone just logs off. He obviously wasn't awful.

Zambrano disagreed.  Possibly my favorite thing Z ever did was beat the shit out of Barrett.

Of course it was.

I can think of at least one game winning hit he had while he was here but, hey, I don't really expect you to actually like The Cubs.

Yeah that time Zambrano threw a no hitter? Fuck that. The time he homered from both sides of the plate in the same game? Who cares. That time he punched a teammate? Oh yeah, that's where it is.

I was talking about Barrett's game winner against the A's.   But, yeah...Chuck doesn't really like baseball.

Oh I know you were talking about Barrett, I was focusing on Chuck saying that "possibly his favorite moment" of one of the greatest pitchers in franchise history was the time he beat up his own teammate in a game they lost. That really says it all.

[World's #1 Astros Fan]

It's way too early to try and wrap my head around how Chuck argues on the Internet.

If the discussion is "Was Michael Barrett awful or was he serviceable" I think it's best if everyone just logs off. He obviously wasn't awful.

Zambrano disagreed.  Possibly my favorite thing Z ever did was beat the shit out of Barrett.

Of course it was.

I can think of at least one game winning hit he had while he was here but, hey, I don't really expect you to actually like The Cubs.

Yeah that time Zambrano threw a no hitter? Fuck that. The time he homered from both sides of the plate in the same game? Who cares. That time he punched a teammate? Oh yeah, that's where it is.

I was talking about Barrett's game winner against the A's.   But, yeah...Chuck doesn't really like baseball.

Don't forget the grand slam off Isringhausen to finish off an April sweep of the Cardinals.

[World's #1 Astros Fan]

I hated Michael Barrett because he was so dumb and he was one of those dopey white guys that never failed to take the bait and wax on about how "awesome" it would be to win a World Series at Wrigley blah blah fucking blah.

But he was a damn useful player for a short period of time. 

Holding these beliefs are not mutually exclusive. 

Chuck, on the other hand...

[SKO]

I hated Michael Barrett because he was so dumb and he was one of those dopey white guys that never failed to take the bait and wax on about how "awesome" it would be to win a World Series at Wrigley blah blah fucking blah.

But he was a damn useful player for a short period of time. 

Holding these beliefs are not mutually exclusive. 

Chuck, on the other hand...

Yeah, I don't think any of us ever actually fucking liked the guy, but as usual the 10.17(c) is so strong we felt compelled to point out that A)Chuck is of course is wrong about his actual ability to play baseball and B)Chuck really just hates the Cubs

[J. Walter Weatherman]

That was a well pitched ball game but he can still get fucked for being such a red ass over a dude admiring a massive bomb. Also, if you're going to yell at a dude for not hustling around the bases after a bomb, maybe get your lazy ass over and cover first on a grounder.

There are guys who you absolutely loathe when they're on the other team and then you love them when they're on yours. Carlos Zambrano is such person. Lackey isn't like that.

Lackey's more like Michael Barrett.

Nah. Lackey's a prick who is pretty good.  Barrett is a fucking idiot who was awful awful.

Barrett was worth 7.5 WAR in his three full seasons as a Cub. I get that you are dumb and say things like "Alfonso Soriano was bad", but if we're making comps of "unlikeable assholes who were pretty decent in a Cub uniform" Barrett most definitely fits the bill.

BBR has him at 5.8 for three seasons. Below their benchmark of 2.0 for bottom level starter.

And there's this.

2 WAR is average, not "bottom level starter." Montero last year was worth 1.8 bWAR. Barrett was an above average  starter  for three years and a jackass his entire life.

I'm just going by this.  They define "Starter" as 2 or more.  You guys can go more in depth on his stats if you want. I gave it all the time it deserved.

Above average:

[Chuck to Chuck]

It's way too early to try and wrap my head around how Chuck argues on the Internet.

If the discussion is "Was Michael Barrett awful or was he serviceable" I think it's best if everyone just logs off. He obviously wasn't awful.

Zambrano disagreed.  Possibly my favorite thing Z ever did was beat the shit out of Barrett.

Of course it was.

I can think of at least one game winning hit he had while he was here but, hey, I don't really expect you to actually like The Cubs.

Yeah that time Zambrano threw a no hitter? Fuck that. The time he homered from both sides of the plate in the same game? Who cares. That time he punched a teammate? Oh yeah, that's where it is.

Lots of Cubs have thrown no hitters. Lots of Cubs pitchers have homered.  Only one time ever has anyone decked Michael Barrett in the dugout and the clubhouse.

I embrace the uniqueness.

[World's #1 Astros Fan]

It's way too early to try and wrap my head around how Chuck argues on the Internet.

If the discussion is "Was Michael Barrett awful or was he serviceable" I think it's best if everyone just logs off. He obviously wasn't awful.

Zambrano disagreed.  Possibly my favorite thing Z ever did was beat the shit out of Barrett.

Of course it was.

I can think of at least one game winning hit he had while he was here but, hey, I don't really expect you to actually like The Cubs.

Yeah that time Zambrano threw a no hitter? Fuck that. The time he homered from both sides of the plate in the same game? Who cares. That time he punched a teammate? Oh yeah, that's where it is.

Lots of Cubs have thrown no hitters. Lots of Cubs pitchers have homered.  Only one time ever has anyone decked Michael Barrett in the dugout and the clubhouse.

I embrace the uniqueness.

Exactly TWO Cubs pitchers have thrown no-hitters in your conscious lifetime, assuming you're too young to recall Pappas' or Burt Hooton's.

Stop being such an irrepressible tool please.