Cubs Pursuit of a Parade 2018 Postseason Thread

[Quality Start Machine]

If this ends in a one and done, who gets fired?

Nobody?

Nobody.

Nobody.

Somebody.

Wait.  I mean nobody.

Nobody.

Hopefully a good number of somebodies...starting with Joe retiring.  Then the hitting and pitching coaches.  Burn it to the ground.

Young talent outside of Baez and Almora is regressing, or at best, not progressing.  Schwarber is a huge missed opportunity to deal to the AL (which is the only place he will ever have value).  In the NL he's a LH Mark Bellhorn that plays LF.  Happ is a lost cause.  KB certainly doesn't look like a HOF player - expectations of legit power from him should be revised down.  Russell is a wife beater and overrated.  There are no young arms anywhere close to the bigs.  How the fuck can this vaunted front office not have a Miles Mikolas equivalent to show for their efforts?

This team isn't getting better from within.  And there's way too much dead weight going into the offseason.  The NL was trash this year, and this team would have been lucky to win 84 in the AL East or West. 

Machado or bust this offseason.

Are you drug-tested at work?

If not, have you thought about picking up a drug habit?

Has he met Coke Hamels?

I think Oleg would recommend Guillermo Mota.

Joaquin is the only person under 70 who is dead but who also pitched in a World Series Game 7 (Mike Cuellar is the other).

But, really, I was going for this.

And, incidentally, the Spanish slang term (or, at least one of them) for cocaine is "Nieve" which is, literally, "snow".

I learn something new everyday.

I'll bet you don't.

You clearly don't understand just how little I know.

Don't sell yourself short.

Oleg and I see eye to eye on this.  And everything else.

I remember the time you two were outside my house and my neighbors complained about the ugly lawn jockeys.

A couple of red cone hats and the problem is solved.

Or a plank, and I've got instant picnic table.

[CBStew]

If this ends in a one and done, who gets fired?

Nobody?

Nobody.

Nobody.

Somebody.

Wait.  I mean nobody.

Nobody.

Hopefully a good number of somebodies...starting with Joe retiring.  Then the hitting and pitching coaches.  Burn it to the ground.

Young talent outside of Baez and Almora is regressing, or at best, not progressing.  Schwarber is a huge missed opportunity to deal to the AL (which is the only place he will ever have value).  In the NL he's a LH Mark Bellhorn that plays LF.  Happ is a lost cause.  KB certainly doesn't look like a HOF player - expectations of legit power from him should be revised down.  Russell is a wife beater and overrated.  There are no young arms anywhere close to the bigs.  How the fuck can this vaunted front office not have a Miles Mikolas equivalent to show for their efforts?

This team isn't getting better from within.  And there's way too much dead weight going into the offseason.  The NL was trash this year, and this team would have been lucky to win 84 in the AL East or West. 

Machado or bust this offseason.

Are you drug-tested at work?

If not, have you thought about picking up a drug habit?

Has he met Coke Hamels?

I think Oleg would recommend Guillermo Mota.

Joaquin is the only person under 70 who is dead but who also pitched in a World Series Game 7 (Mike Cuellar is the other).

But, really, I was going for this.

And, incidentally, the Spanish slang term (or, at least one of them) for cocaine is "Nieve" which is, literally, "snow".

I learn something new everyday.

I'll bet you don't.

You clearly don't understand just how little I know.

Don't sell yourself short.

Oleg and I see eye to eye on this.  And everything else.

I remember the time you two were outside my house and my neighbors complained about the ugly lawn jockeys.

A couple of red cone hats and the problem is solved.

Or a plank, and I've got instant picnic table.

That's it!  I am reporting all of you to the SPCLP. 

[Bort]

If this ends in a one and done, who gets fired?

Nobody?

Nobody.

Nobody.

Somebody.

Wait.  I mean nobody.

Nobody.

Hopefully a good number of somebodies...starting with Joe retiring.  Then the hitting and pitching coaches.  Burn it to the ground.

Young talent outside of Baez and Almora is regressing, or at best, not progressing.  Schwarber is a huge missed opportunity to deal to the AL (which is the only place he will ever have value).  In the NL he's a LH Mark Bellhorn that plays LF.  Happ is a lost cause.  KB certainly doesn't look like a HOF player - expectations of legit power from him should be revised down.  Russell is a wife beater and overrated.  There are no young arms anywhere close to the bigs.  How the fuck can this vaunted front office not have a Miles Mikolas equivalent to show for their efforts?

This team isn't getting better from within.  And there's way too much dead weight going into the offseason.  The NL was trash this year, and this team would have been lucky to win 84 in the AL East or West. 

Machado or bust this offseason.

Are you drug-tested at work?

If not, have you thought about picking up a drug habit?

Has he met Coke Hamels?

I think Oleg would recommend Guillermo Mota.

Joaquin is the only person under 70 who is dead but who also pitched in a World Series Game 7 (Mike Cuellar is the other).

But, really, I was going for this.

And, incidentally, the Spanish slang term (or, at least one of them) for cocaine is "Nieve" which is, literally, "snow".

I learn something new everyday.

I'll bet you don't.

You clearly don't understand just how little I know.

Don't sell yourself short.

Oleg and I see eye to eye on this.  And everything else.

I remember the time you two were outside my house and my neighbors complained about the ugly lawn jockeys.

A couple of red cone hats and the problem is solved.

Or a plank, and I've got instant picnic table.

That's it!  I am reporting all of you to the SPCLP.

I spent forever trying to figure that out because I thought you were going for an SPLC reference, not an SPCA one.