2018-2019 Wrongs-Righting Cubs Offseason BRYCE HARPER OR BUST Thread

[CBStew]

Finally the season is over. Now it's time to SPEND THE RICKETTS' MONEY (on anything other than funding Trump/GOP politics)! SPEND SPEND SPEND!

At first I read this as "...spend the Rocket's money...", making me wonder if there was an inter-sports cabal that I knew nothing about.

But back to the point, that sure worked with Darvish, didn't it?

[Saul Goodman]

Finally the season is over. Now it's time to SPEND THE RICKETTS' MONEY (on anything other than funding Trump/GOP politics)! SPEND SPEND SPEND!

At first I read this as "...spend the Rocket's money...", making me wonder if there was an inter-sports cabal that I knew nothing about.

But back to the point, that sure worked with Darvish, didn't it?

It's simple. If you sign all of the players, at least some of them will turn out to be good. Thank you for coming to my Ted talk.

[Wheezer]

Finally the season is over. Now it's time to SPEND THE RICKETTS' MONEY (on anything other than funding Trump/GOP politics)! SPEND SPEND SPEND!

So long as I get beer and souvlaki out of the deal, I'm down.

[Saul Goodman]

Cubs announce they'll exercise Quintana's 2019 club option.  But we knew that already.

[Saul Goodman]

What is this crying poverty bullshit. Guess we're supposed to be happy with Cole Hamels, Jesse Chavez, and a bucket of balls when two generational talents are available as free agents in their 20s?

[Quality Start Machine]

What is this crying poverty bullshit. Guess we're supposed to be happy with Cole Hamels, Jesse Chavez, and a bucket of balls when two generational talents are available as free agents in their 20s?

I don't believe a word of that shit. With Hamels, Zobrist and Morrow (if they don't pick up his 2020 option) all due to roll off after the 2019 season, that's $41.5 million off the payroll. The following year is Lester and Chatwalk, another $32 million.

Even if they go over the luxury tax threshold this year, they'll be under after that. And they're in a championship window, and they're going to launch whatever TV/Streaming package they're cooking up.

Theo's going to go balls-deep to get another championship - I have no idea why they're faking austerity here.

[Saul Goodman]

What is this crying poverty bullshit. Guess we're supposed to be happy with Cole Hamels, Jesse Chavez, and a bucket of balls when two generational talents are available as free agents in their 20s?

I don't believe a word of that shit. With Hamels, Zobrist and Morrow (if they don't pick up his 2020 option) all due to roll off after the 2019 season, that's $41.5 million off the payroll. The following year is Lester and Chatwalk, another $32 million.

Even if they go over the luxury tax threshold this year, they'll be under after that. And they're in a championship window, and they're going to launch whatever TV/Streaming package they're cooking up.

Theo's going to go balls-deep to get another championship - I have no idea why they're faking austerity here.

If they don't even bother pursuing Harper or Machado and largely sit out this offseason due to "the budget," they deserve to have their asses handed to them by the Brewers next year.  I'm tired of hearing that any improvement will have to come from the current roster when they're in a perfect position to supplement that roster with proven talent that costs only money, which they have plenty of.  It's time to stop dreaming on guys when better alternatives to help you win are available.

Wasn't the whole point of adding all these new revenue streams to make it possible to take risks and make some mistakes in free agency (but still end up with players like, you know, BRYCE FUCKING HARPER, who would have led them in wRC+ last year)?  And if they shrug as they bring back Daniel Murphy and/or Addison Russell and turn out their pockets so a moth can fly out, I'm reaching for my pitchfork.

[CBStew]

The Cubs acquired Descalso because...?
1.  They needed a guy with a 5 o'clock shadow instead of a beard for the team picture.
2.  They needed someone over 30 as a chaperone on road trips.
3.  ...(?)

[Saul Goodman]

The Cubs acquired Descalso because...?
1.  They needed a guy with a 5 o'clock shadow instead of a beard for the team picture.
2.  They needed someone over 30 as a chaperone on road trips.
3.  ...(?)

Because we broke! Yep, we don't know how it happened but the Cubs no longer have any money.  Brother, can you spare a dime?

[Quality Start Machine]

The Cubs acquired Descalso because...?
1.  They needed a guy with a 5 o'clock shadow instead of a beard for the team picture.
2.  They needed someone over 30 as a chaperone on road trips.
3.  ...(?)

Because we broke! Yep, we don't know how it happened but the Cubs no longer have any money.  Brother, can you spare a dime?

The Cubs are undergoing a spareadime shift.

[Saul Goodman]

The Cubs acquired Descalso because...?
1.  They needed a guy with a 5 o'clock shadow instead of a beard for the team picture.
2.  They needed someone over 30 as a chaperone on road trips.
3.  ...(?)

Because we broke! Yep, we don't know how it happened but the Cubs no longer have any money.  Brother, can you spare a dime?

The Cubs are undergoing a spareadime shift.

Plenty of money to air "Grown Assholes Who Love Beer and Assaulting Women Are Actually Good" ads, but good baseball players? You think we're made of money?!